It could have happened to anybody. A lot of Dr. Phil clips will show you young (well, middle-aged) people just absolutely convinced that the person they were sending money to for "their construction business" was going to pay them back that $250,000, and also was going to fly out and marry them, just as soon as they got their passport sitch fixed. Dr. Phil tries not to call them fucking idiots, but you can only not call them fucking idiots for so long.
You may have noticed that ol' Wonkette dot com tends to be a pretty white sort of place. We have a gay, and a senior, and a bunch of vagendas, but it's been really some time since we had any writers of color. And when you write quite a bit about police brutality, the justice system, and Jeff Sessions, that severe lack becomes severely embarrassing.
A couple weeks ago, we left Montana to head to DC for the #teens' March For Our Lives (we drive slow). We stopped by to see our girlfriend on the way out of town, and her friendly, not-stupid, but very racist trucker boyfriend was so happy for us! "Whatcha doing in New York?" he wanted to know. He was so excited! "No, we're going to DC," I told him, delightedly. "We're going to take your guns!"
My fiance never punched me. He never choked me. But he did hold me down on the bed, trying unsuccessfully to rip the diamonds from my ears so I couldn't "fuck anyone else when I was wearing them." He always thought I was fucking everyone, most especially any gay friends who had dropped by for coffee, because clearly being gay was a ruse. I was never fucking anyone. He was though, often leaving a sweet note on the pillow to tell me he'd gone home because he couldn't sleep and didn't want to wake me, and going to another woman's house instead.
Boy howdy if the year of our Lord 2017 ain't been one hell of a shit pile. To channel my inner Jim Lahey, a real shit cherry, sitting on the top of a shit sundae, with streams of hot shit topping flowing around the shit sprinkles. But I, your humble Shypixel, am here to fix all of that for you.