Area 51 'Mosque' Design Is Frank Gehry By Way of Ayatollah & Superman
If you are anything like most of the world's Muslims, you spend your days leafing throughDwell and Architectural Digest, wondering just how you will achieve the correct interplay of light and shadow in your third second home in the Berkshires. Thus, you and your Mohammedan friends will surely be thrilled to learn of the fabulous design plans for the infamous "Nieuwe Amsterdaam Mosque," which some Real Americans argue is located uncomfortably close to Anthony Bourdain's Les Halles Downtown. Also, it is Superman's ice-diamond house owned by Marlon Brando?
Visitors to the upper floors of the Muslim community center planned for near ground zero would walk through lofty spaces — for art exhibitions, for contemplation and prayer, for programs on interreligious dialogue, for a 9/11 memorial — as sunlight streams through irregularly shaped windows between white crisscrossing beams.
Yes, the proposed interior of this particular Islamic cultural center combines the peppy good cheer of Jennifer Aniston's beachfront bungalow with the sexiness that only monotheism can offer. But wait, there's Moor (HA!):
A sketch of the façade shows a latticework of white starlike designs, echoing patterns that can be seen in Islamic architecture and decorative tiles across the Middle East.
The design was meant to show “hints of tradition,” while the use of modern materials and glass panels would give an impression of translucence and “moving toward the future,” Sharif el-Gamal, the project’s developer, said in an interview last week.
Surely when these elements of design are explained in tiny, tiny words to the shit-filled skulls that sit atop the fat, sweaty necks of the center's opponents, all will be well. This will undoubtedly discourage the protesters who visit the neighborhood where CERTAIN PEOPLE ACTUALLY LIVE AND NEED TO GET TO THE SUBWAY ON TIME THANK YOU VERY FUCKING MUCH YOU IGNORANT OOZING PUSTULES, YOU HUMAN TUMORS.
So, you know, that's good.
But is it actually Superman's house, or is it a message to the Space Aliens who are just looking for an excuse to bomb us, from space? We just received this anonymous note in the Wonkette tips box:
park51 mosque design is giant secret message visible from space. we are all so fucked.
Also, the Daily Mail says it's covered in Jew Stars of David! Does Rick Sanchez know about this? And why did all the 9/11 terrorists live with him in Florida?