National Journal Would Like You Ron Paul Fanatics To Knock It Off

We have nothing against Brave Ron Paul. In fact, we endorsed him about six months ago because he promised to destroy Washington.

But the Ron Paul geeks are ... well, they are always so angry because flooding online polls doesn't actually translate to real polls of 70-year-old Republican primary voters in Iowa and New Hampshire who will actually choose a candidate who will say "conservative" things while promising them more Social Security, Medicare benefits, and ethanol/cranberry subsidies. Look, we were sad when we found out "democracy" was all bullshit, too, but we were seven years old at the time, and we've since had a few decades to "get over it" and "become alcoholics."

Some Ron Paul geeks got very angry about our fun trick last night -- we put Ron Paul on our "Choose the Debate Winner" poll and watched as someone quickly voted for Ron Paul 5,000 times, obviously putting him in First Place, and then we changed his name to "The Mickey Mouse from HAMAS-TV," so that we'd have a real winner. And then the Ron Paul geeks got on their Linux or whatever and HAX0RD the DoS or something, so now the poll won't load -- either that or shit's just broken on our servers, like always.

White House Rankings: The Republicans [National Journal]


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