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The Washington Post has ruined our Friday night AGAIN, this time with news that Jared Kushner, the 36-year-old real estate developer son-in-law of President Donald Trump, when secretly meeting with Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak and then declining to list it in his security background check forms, asked the Russian ambassador to let Trump transition officials use secure channels inside the Russian embassy to have secret talks with Vladimir Putin.


The nation's elderly fathers were furious.

"Who does this 35-year-old fucking punk with his 600 million dollars think he is, parading around with Russia and thinking he's going to beat the FBI," old dads, 79, scoffed into the telephone to their daughters, the editrix of the nation's premier mommyblog and recipe hub. The nation's fathers do not care for little fucking punks with $600 million.

"He's not very smart," the nation's daughters explained to their elderly fathers, before regaling them with tales of Jared Kushner's badness at real estate, and why that badness at real estate necessitates an infusion of capital, which dovetails nicely with the meeting set up by Sergey Kislyak for Jared Kushner and a Russian bank, Vnesheconombank (VEB), which is under US sanction. Also, the nation's daughters reminded their dad, Donald Trump too also is not very good at real estate. "So where's all his money from," the nation's dads asked. "Do you really think it's all just from the Russian mob?"

Yes. Yes the nation's daughters do. Plus a little light fraud here and there.

The nation's daughters forgot to add that the documentation revealed by the Post also confirmed t

hat Kushner and the disgraced then-future/now-former National Security Adviser, Mike Flynn, arranged with Kislyak the secret January meeting in the Seychelles between a Russian emissary and scary weirdo mercenary and brother of Betsy DeVos Erik Prince, formerly of Blackwater, but in their defense the nation's dads are super deaf and they have to yell the whole time they're on the phone.

In other breaking news, the Senate Intelligence Committee has asked the Trump campaign to "gather and produce all documents, emails and phone records going back to his campaign’s launch in June 2015." We're sure they'll get right on it.

[WaPo / WaPo]

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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'Bella" by Wonkette Operative 'IdiokraticSubpoenaKommissar'

Sunday already, which means a substantial portion of US America is preparing to be astonished/heartbroken/outraged by the series finale of that show with the dragons, while another portion is just going to stay off Twitter for three days because nothing will make any sense. Yr Dok Zoom tends to come very late to trendy things, so get ready for our own thoughts on the gamy thrones show sometime in about 2023, or never. But we'd be glad to tell you just how much we enjoy the brilliance and humanity of the Cartoon Network series "Steven Universe," which debuted in 2013 and we started bingeing on the Hulu last month, late again.

Hell, we still want to talk about that one Mrs Landingham episode of "The West Wing," which we first watched years after it aired (We finally bought our new used car yesterday, and know one thing: don't drive over to the White House to show it off to President Bartlet). We might even get around to reading Infinite Jest someday. We hear it has something to do with a superhero team and a guy named Thanos. So hey, let's talk about culture and missing out and patching together some knowledge of what's happening anyway.

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Get Me Roger Stone

Roger Stone, his wife would like you to know, is broke. And he is not dealing with it well. Once in khaki suits, gee, he looked swell, full of that yankee-doodle-dee-dum, but now no one calls him Al anymore and he has to stand on a street corner singing "Brother Can You Spare A Dime?"

Yesterday, the conservative but also kind of Never Trumper site The Bulwark revealed the details of a grifty "fundraising" plea sent out by Stone's wife Nydia, begging supporters to give money to the Stones in order to help them keep up the lifestyle to which they have become accustomed.

It was titled "I am embarrassed to write this."

"Dear Friend," begins the missive. "My husband and I have an urgent new problem and we need your help. I told my husband I was going to write you, one of his most valued supporters. I am embarrassed to write this, but I must."

"Mrs. Roger Stone" tells a tale of woe: FBI agents swooping in on them at the crack of dawn to arrest her husband, a subsequent "fake news" feeding frenzy causing friends and fans to abandon the Stones.

"He laid off all our consultants, contractors and employees, and we have 'pulled in our belts' like so many Americans in 'tight times,'" she wrote, sounding for all the world like a plucky working-class patriot, not the wife of a man who made and lost his fortune lying in the service of power.

She should have been more embarrassed.

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