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Sure sure, "President" Donald Trump was just casually lighting the Middle East on fire today when he announced he's now recognizing Jerusalem as Israel's capital, and would move the US embassy from Tel Aviv (a "united" Jerusalem forecloses the possibility of Palestinian "East Jerusalem" or shared sovereignty of the city, which is holy to all three Abrahamic religions). It's serious, and Palestinians are calling for "days of rage."


($5F wrote it up proper for you last week, because she actually understands "Israel" and whatnot, you go here and read it.)

But let's take a moment to appreciate, or the opposite of that, this disgusting video of Donald Trump's dentures trying to escape his mouth.

Now imagine him popping a Tic-Tac and coming at you.

The end.

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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In 2014, Pastor Jamie Coots of the Full Gospel Tabernacle in Jesus' Name church in Middlesborough, Kentucky died from a rattlesnake bite. Was it a camping accident? Did something go terribly wrong at the zoo? No, he was handling those snakes on purpose, in order to demonstrate how super holy he was. Not holy enough, it seems,

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Once upon a time, Immigration and Customs Enforcement officers at least claimed to focus their efforts entirely on immigrants involved in criminal activity. Those days are long gone, and now they're going after anyone, including law-abiding people who are just trying to drive their pregnant wives to the hospital to give birth.

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  • Saturday, Aug 11th ....... Seattle, WA
    Discovery Park, 4-7pm
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