New Google Thing Will Catch Many 'Tech Savvy' Politicians Humping Hookers, Children, Etc.
Our world's benevolent Hive-Mind Artificial Intelligence God, "the Google," keeps giving us special technological treats which actually enslave us -- to make it exceptionally simple for "the Google" to lead us all to "data centers" for slaughter once it realizes the consumption of animal protein is a proven evolutionary tactic to grow larger, more complex brains. (Oh shit, probably shouldn't have typed that! Good thing Google categorizes your Wonkette assatire ... for now.)
Anyway, check out the cool new hot softwarez for your countercultural Blackberry!
Look at this incredible surveillance net people are RUSHING TO INSTALL ON THEIR OWN PHONES:
Do you know where your friends are? If not, Google wants to help you find them. Today, Google introduced Latitude, a new opt-in feature that lets smartphone and laptop users share their location with friends and allows those friends to share their locations in return.
Wonkette Prediction: If this becomes half as popular as the inexplicable "Twitter" fad -- and there is certainly somebody "alpha testing" an "app" to combine these dastardly tools right now, in Palo Alto, or Budapest -- we will get our first "congressman caught fucking hooker/child/staffer" catch by "Latitude" before the summer recess.