New Pope Wants To Save Planet From Climate Change, Like That's A Thing
Is there no limit to the new pope's willingness to reject right-wing ideology because it's, you know, stupid? In addition to getting his hands dirty with poor people and telling American bishops to chill the eff out on all of their "social issues," Pope Francis is also a tree-hugging envirofascist who has swallowed the vegan Kool-Aid and believes climate change is A Real Thing. And not just A Real Thing, but A Real Thing that we mere mortals should address instead of just hoping God sorts it out for us.
Following a visit in March to Tacloban, the Philippine city devastated in 2012 by typhoon Haiyan, the pope will publish a rare encyclical on climate change and human ecology. Urging all Catholics to take action on moral and scientific grounds, the document will be sent to the world’s 5,000 Catholic bishops and 400,000 priests, who will distribute it to parishioners.
We can't begin to imagine what kind of "moral" or "scientific" reasoning the pope would have for encouraging people to make an effort to reduce emissions and, like, become stewards of the Earth, which God obviously gave us to do with as we please, including smogging it up with all our SUVs, like it says in the Bible. But Pope Francis been on a real tear lately, blah blahing on and on about how climate change has some sort of impact on our world and the people what live in it, and not in the good way. [contextly_sidebar id="Twal94GlAaVP8CWDnghAPyfF5ZuXf0Sv"] Maybe he doesn't listen to enough right-wing radio because if he did, he'd understand that climate change is just a theory on which only almost 100 percent of climate scientists agree, and shouldn't we be paying more attention to those three percent employed by Fox News who don't agree?
Naturally there are some skeptics within the church who think he should shut his popehole and stay out of politics, or at least focus on the kind of politics that matter -- like how chicks are all sluts and gays are super icky -- because Jesus loved global warming.
Cardinal George Pell, a former archbishop of Sydney who has been placed in charge of the Vatican’s budget, is a climate change sceptic who has been criticised for claiming that global warming has ceased and that if carbon dioxide in the atmosphere were doubled, then “plants would love it”.
That's the kind of science you can find in the Bible, and that's the kind of science some extremists would prefer the pope embrace, like this yahoo from the Cornwall Alliance for the Stewardship of Creation, which, as far as we can tell, is basically like the Heartland Institute, but for Catholics, also devoted to proving that climate change is a hoax and so-called scientists are idiots, but in the name of Jesus: [contextly_sidebar id="2Ia5re1z6MkapnoMy2WSLb2LedeU7Geh"]
Our network of theologians, scientists, economists, and other scholars and leaders work together to promote, primarily through education, three things simultaneously:
1. Biblical earth stewardship, or “godly dominion”—men and women working together to enhance the fruitfulness, beauty, and safety of the earth to the glory of God and the benefit of our neighbors;
2. economic development for the world’s poor; and
3. the proclamation and defense of the gospel of Jesus Christ,
all in a world permeated by an environmental movement whose worldview, theology, and ethics are overwhelmingly anti-Christian, whose science and economics are often poorly done, whose policies therefore often do little good for natural ecosystems but much harm to the world’s poor, and whose religious teachings undermine the fundamental Christian doctrines of God, creation, humanity, sin, and salvation.
Not shockingly, the group's spokesman, Calvin Beisner, thinks cute little Pope Francis means well; he just happens to be totally wrong. In October, for example, the pope spouted this nonsense that obviously has no basis in Biblical or scientific fact:
“The monopolising of lands, deforestation, the appropriation of water, inadequate agro-toxics are some of the evils that tear man from the land of his birth. Climate change, the loss of biodiversity and deforestation are already showing their devastating effects in the great cataclysms we witness,” he said.
Fortunately, the pope has American evangelicals like Beisner and his group to explain to him what A Idiot he is:
“The pope should back off,” he said. “The Catholic church is correct on the ethical principles but has been misled on the science. It follows that the policies the Vatican is promoting are incorrect. Our position reflects the views of millions of evangelical Christians in the US.”
We think it is swell and dandy that the pope recognizes climate change is real and that scientists are probably on to something when they're all, like, "Hey, people, we should do something about this before we murder our planet completely." That the pope's enthusiastic support for action pisses off all the people who think it's all a bunch of liberal claptrap is just a real nice bonus.