Obama: Let The Hicks Have Their Guns!
Wonkette correspondent Katie Clancy, who stirred the pot with a brief incendiary report from a book party for Hunter S. Thompson bio Gonzo, weighs in on Obama's fuzzy stance on gun control.
Gun Lovers Unite! Obama does support 2nd amendment rights -- as long as you live on a farm and have a gun rack in your truck. Driving through Harlan, Iowa this past weekend (wild country!), Michelle Obama apparently took a stand on gun control through urban-tinted goggles.
Reports The Baltimore Sun: "My wife, she was traveling up, I think, in eastern Iowa, she was driving through this nice, beautiful area, going through all this farmland and hills and rivers and she said 'Boy, it's really pretty up here,' but she said, 'But you know, I can see why if I was living out here, I'd want a gun. Because, you know, 911 is going to take some time before somebody responds. You know what I mean? You know, it's like five miles between every house."
Sure, that makes sense... except for the fact it works both ways: if some hick went meandering through the projects in an inner city, he would figure the same thing about 911 response and protection. Before summing it up, Obama reverted to his favorite folksy buzz phrase: Use Common Sense.
"Use common sense. We should be able to do that, and we should be able to enforce laws that keep guns off the streets in inner cities because some unscrupulous gun dealer is, you know, letting somebody load up a van with a bunch of cheap handguns or sawed-off shotguns and dumping them and selling them for a profit in the streets."
True. But how is he going to enforce this? Can a President determine who has the right to bear arms based on how many gold teeth or cornfields (or cornrows) you have? How does a President decide who gets to sleep with shotguns under their beds? Because surely it's not just the rural folk who feel threatened by monsters in the night. At least they can go on shooting things under the proud title of defense and sportsmanship; inner city residents will have to work harder at obtaining a valid gun permit, keep slinking away to the black-market back alleys, sell more candy, and love thy neighbor.
While Obama's website doesn't address gun control specifically, it does talk about honoring war veterans. And everyone know they love guns (otherwise they wouldn't have gone to war!)
Maybe we should consult Fred Thompson. At least he's not on the fence, proving this Sunday as he wooed right-wingers by parading rifles overhead at a gun show in Southern Carolina. Floating all glassy-eyed down an isle of pistols and handguns, he repeatedly referred to the show as "true paradise." Either way, Republicans might actually have to think, and at least consider voting Obama if he wins the Democratic ticket. Or, you know, not.