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Despite stern warnings from Senate Republicans that so-called "President" Obama better not do anything crazy, like act as if he is the president, the wussy tyrant usurper-in-chief has decided once again to invite them to perform sexual relations on their own orifices. Having checked his own personal copy of the Constitution to confirm that yup, says right there he's supposed to appoint justices to the Supreme Court, President B. Hussein O'How Do You Like Them Judicial Apples, HUH? has gone and picked hisself an unelected robed lawyer to knock back a few with Ruth Bader Ginsburg before the next State of the Union.

In an email from the White House, the president said he is nominating someone to replace Dead Antonin Scalia, who, sorry but no, is not allowed to "vote" on cases from the great beyond:


As President, it is both my constitutional duty to nominate a Justice and one of the most important decisions that I -- or any president -- will make.

I've devoted a considerable amount of time and deliberation to this decision. I've consulted with legal experts and people across the political spectrum, both inside and outside government. And we’ve reached out to every member of the Senate, who each have a responsibility to do their job and take this nomination just as seriously.

That's O-speak for "Do your job, you sons a bitches."

I’m confident you’ll share my conviction that this American is not only eminently qualified to be a Supreme Court Justice, but deserves a fair hearing, and an up-or-down vote.

In putting forward a nominee today, I am fulfilling my constitutional duty. I’m doing my job. I hope that our Senators will do their jobs, and move quickly to consider my nominee. That is what the Constitution dictates, and that’s what the American people expect and deserve from their leaders.

[contextly_sidebar id="ILmCUoV1P8LPhrac8ksDo1nEd38DLFMJ"]We expect Republicans will realize the error of their ways, Senate Judiciary Committee Chairguy Chuck Grassley will schedule a confirmation hearing soon, and the Senate will hold an upper-down vote on the president's nominee. Or, alternately, none of that will happen, Americans will continue to roll their eyes in exasperation and hate the crap out of the obstructionist party, and they will suffer the consequences in November, only to have to confirm Hillary Clinton's nominee next January.

The president will be speaking at 11 AM Eastern, or whatever time he actually starts (#WhyIsObamaLate), from the Rose Garden of the White House where he lives and works, because he is the president, to introduce us to our new Scalia. Let's watch!

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