Obama Reminds Republican Losers They Are The Losingest Losers Who Lost Like Losers
Commemorating the fifth anniversary ofthe fundamentals of our economy being strong (you know, except to everyone who was not John McCain and was all, like, Holy crisis, Batman, we are in economic meltdown!), President Obama spoke words on stuff, including that pesky Obamacare thingymabob that he probably will just defund his own self anyway, so why even bother talking about it, including this protip to Republicans: you guys are losers.
"It passed both houses of Congress. The Supreme Court ruled it constitutional. It was an issue in last year's election and the candidate who called for repeal lost," he said to applause. "Republicans in the House have tried to repeal or sabotage it about 40 times. They've failed every time."
Oh, presidential SNAP!
We consulted our president-to-English dictionary, and we're pretty sure that translates loosely to: Shut the fuck up, already, losers, and get over it! Not that they will, of course. Republicans are still rubbing their half brain cell together to figure out how to get rid of Obamacare. (Apparently, they are not taking seriously Sarah Palin's super helpful suggestion that we just drop some bombs on it also. Yet.)
Some Republicans who are members of the batshit crazy caucus think maybe they should use any means necessary, including shutting down the entire government, even though another -- sigh, yes, another -- poll shows that most Americans, regardless of how they feel about Obamacare, would like them to not do that please.
Oh well. It is T-minus two weeks until Americans can start enrolling in the health care exchanges, which, hey, will be even cheaper than previously predicted, so maybe once the Obama Holocausting begins and the world does not end and doctors are not forced to ask their patients about buttsex, Republicans will stop trying to make repeal happen. But we doubt it because, you know, Republicans.