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Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who won the Democratic primary in NY-14 by committing SOCIALISM SORCERY, has won another primary, because apparently she thinks she is entitled to do SOCIALISM REDISTRIBUTION of all the primaries in the whole American land TO HERSELF. Well, Wonkette has one word for that and it is PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!

OK we are kidding. But she did win another primary in a district she isn't even running to represent. It is New York's 15th district, which is next door to the 14th. She didn't win the Democratic primary though, but rather the Reform Party's primary, and she won it by collecting NINE WRITE-IN VOTES. She even beat the incumbent, Democratic Rep. Jose Serrano!


In response, Ocasio-Cortez declared victory and anointed herself president of all the primaries in all of America and was last seen marching toward the White House to go ahead and pick out Oval Office decor while El Dipshit is out of town, just so she has it ready for the 2024 election, which she will be just barely eligible for.

Just kidding, she graciously LOLed and said she'll go ahead and be president of NY-14 for now:

She WOULD say that.

OK, we really have nothing else to say about this besides how it is a cute story to end our day, so we will go ahead and make this your OPEN THREAD and get the fuck outta here. Goodbye!

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Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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Can we just say that when Fox idiot Maria Bartiromo sounds like the sane person in a situation, that is a worrisome situation? That is what happened when Donald Trump -- who's just had a fantastic Infrastructure Week, assuming it is Infrastructure Week, and we always do -- sat down for what was supposed to be an easy breezy "You're the best!"/"No YOU are, Mister President!" interview with his beloved Fox pals.

Instead Maria Bartiromo had to ask the question on everybody's mind, which is WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU OH MY GOD, or, more clearly, is there a reason you have spent this entire week of your presidency picking a fight with a dead guy, who somehow seems to be winning that fight, because you are literally so stupid and incompetent you LOSE FIGHTS TO DEAD GUYS?

She said it nicer than that, though.

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Last fall, after Wisconsin voters rejected Gov. Scott Walker's reelection bid and chose Democrat Tony Evers instead, Republicans in the state legislature got very busy doing anything they could to limit the power of the incoming governor and the new Democratic attorney general, Josh Kaul. Hey, voters may have chosen Evers, but that didn't mean Rs had to let Democrats actually govern, now did it? As Republican state House Speaker Robin Vos rather notoriously said at the time, the lege had to act because "We are going to have a very liberal governor who is going to enact policies that are in direct contrast to what many of us believe in." So in a two day "extraordinary session," the Republicans shifted power from the executive branch and gave those powers to the legislature, which conveniently remained in Republican control thanks to gerrymandering. Scott Walker signed the bills and then began his career as an idiot on Twitter.

Yesterday, a Wisconsin judge found the entire lame duck session violated the state constitution, and invalidated the laws it passed. Dane County Circuit Judge Richard Niess said in his decision the Wisconsin constitution is quite specific about when the legislature can meet, and nope, the "extraordinary session" didn't meet the constitutional requirements, so sorry guys, you didn't follow the rules and your laws ARE MOOT.

The Associated Press lawsplains the constitutional neener-neener:

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