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Oh Just FYI: Your American Recession Dollars Are Going Towards Enabling Obama's Fascist Agricultural Hobbies

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  • Obama is still draining all the stimulus recession dollars on his personal communist pet project: re-sodding the National Mall in such a way that one million red roses spring up in shape of Stalin's silhouette. Terrible, just terrible. [RedState]
  • Hillary Clinton isn't sure whether she'd like America to have the opportunity to read the sequel to Dick Cheney's torture fan fiction—Waterboarding Towards Bethlehem: A Nationbuildingsroman—and said some awkward thing about Cheney being weird, just to avoid the question! [Daily Intel]
  • Nate Silver sees four (or, "4") futures for the Republican Party. He thinks a drift towards libertarianism is the best way to go, so that should tell you something about the other three options. [FiveThirtyEight]
  • Obama is making good on his pinkie swear to no one that he is so all about Service. [The Caucus]
  • NRSC Chairman Jon Cornyn has given up on pretending that the Dems aren't going to secure 60 Senate seats. So, do with that what you will Norm Coleman—you will anyway. [Matt Yglesias]
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I wasn't ready for Koko the gorilla to die. She was just 46, so still young well past the upper age limit for a gorilla, but I'll miss her. She loved cats, told mildly amusing jokes, and put up with people, so she was a lot like your weird aunt.

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Donald Trump held one of his televised cabinet meetings today in which he railed about the terrible Democrats who forced the current border crisis (at a time when illegal border crossings are actually lower than usual). In what's sure to be his favorite phrase on Twitter for the next few days, Trump blamed "extremist open-border Democrats" for all the problems he brought on himself with his family separation policy, and explained that Democrats were simultaneously hurting illegal immigrants AND the rest of America by forcing Normal America to accept Central Americans who fled to the US. It made loads of sense! And then things got ... less so.

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