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Do things feel just a little more exciting today? That's hardly surprising, because the Barack Obama Administration is now 99 days old, which is exactly one (1) day shy of the super-important 100th birthday of the First Hundred Days. How is our young, useless, radical foreign-born Chicago street thug from Indonesia dealing with the stress? Sources say he started off the day by strangling the military imbecile who approved yesterday'sthrilling 9/11 air parade in Manhattan, then he signed an executive order making it legal to kick the shit out of Mitch McConnell, and then he went downstairs to shoot some hoops for a while -- using that idiot water mongrel as the "basketball." [USA Today]

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