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Sorry to any who were hoping Oprah Winfrey would run for president and win in 2020. Alex Jones revealed on his show Monday that if she even tries to run, she will be exposed as a total Oprah LOSEfrey, who LOSES like a LOSER, and the reason is because Oprah is "designed" to use her "black face" to "carry out the enslavement of black folks" and also "everybody else." That ... seems racist? We are just saying!

"Ladies and gentlemen, I have always broken down the fact that Oprah Winfrey is a top globalist, a top eugenicist, who pushes a one world religion through her private foundation. She’s even got a new age movie coming out to brainwash the children." [...]

We’re going to break down why Oprah Winfrey will never be elected president of the United States because of the skeletons in her closet.

This is the guy who "broke down" how chemtrails in the water are turning the frogs into big gay homosexers, and who "broke down" how the Deep State is doing Snow White poisons to Donald Trump by putting roofies in the 12 Diet Cokes he drinks a day, and who "broke down" the truth about how Beyoncé is methodically murdering all white Americans, so ...

So!

Yeah, we still think that is kind of racist?

Then again, Jones also recently correctly identified CNN's Brian Stelter as a person who is literally "drunk on our children's blood," which is just so obvious, like isn't that what you have always thought of CNN's Brian Stelter? (Yes, you are free to Google which one Brian Stelter is, in case you forgot who is LITERALLY DRUNK ON YOUR CHILDREN'S BLOOD like we did. Hint: He's one of the ones who isn't Jake Tapper.)

So ...

So!

OK, screw it, have an open thread, because we don't feel like giving this any more "analysis" than we already have, as it is motherfuckin' EXECUTIVE TIME.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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