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Orly Taintz Acts Funny On Teevee, And A Wonkette Contest!

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Heroic provider of truths Orly Taitz went on television's MSNBC channel this afternoon to discuss her latest proof that Obama is black. Heavens to Betsy! This is too classic. It must be performance art -- Arianna Huffington applying a heavy spray-tan and a Marilyn Monroe wig, channeling her days as a Republican congressman's wife. "LEE-sten to me! LEE-sten LEE-sten, Tahm-ron!" Ha ha! NOW THE IMPORTANT PART: Time for a photo contest!

First, check out this inspirational tips submission from operative "pepsicoke555," who writes, "i just want to be respected by someone for something."

So: can you, dear reader, PRODUCE A REAL IMAGE of Barack Obama's REAL birth certificate? Be creative with those guidelines, and submit your CERTIFIED DOC-U-MINTS to tips@wonkette.com, subject line "ACTUAL LEGAL PROOF THAT SARA K. SMITH IS BLACK," by 1:00 p.m. Tuesday. We will apply a Weigel-esque discriminating eye to decide "which ones are real."

[YouTube]

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I wasn't ready for Koko the gorilla to die. She was just 46, so still young well past the upper age limit for a gorilla, but I'll miss her. She loved cats, told mildly amusing jokes, and put up with people, so she was a lot like your weird aunt.

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Donald Trump held one of his televised cabinet meetings today in which he railed about the terrible Democrats who forced the current border crisis (at a time when illegal border crossings are actually lower than usual). In what's sure to be his favorite phrase on Twitter for the next few days, Trump blamed "extremist open-border Democrats" for all the problems he brought on himself with his family separation policy, and explained that Democrats were simultaneously hurting illegal immigrants AND the rest of America by forcing Normal America to accept Central Americans who fled to the US. It made loads of sense! And then things got ... less so.

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