JD Vance Suuuuuuuuucks At This
More like Jeb! D. Vance.
The reporter with the hottest scoops the past couple weeks has been Tim Alberta in The Atlantic.
On July 10, his piece was “Trump Is Planning For A Landslide Win,” and the sub-headline said, “And his campaign is all but praying Joe Biden doesn’t drop out.”
Well!
Yesterday, it was “This Is Exactly What The Trump Team Feared.”
One fun fact from the latest Alberta is how the Trump team seems to be at the very least wondering if it didn’t blow a great big hillbilly goat when Donald Trump picked JD Vance as his running mate.
Alberta writes in his piece:
Even the selection of Ohio’s Senator J. D. Vance as Trump’s running mate, campaign officials acknowledged, was something of a luxury meant to run up margins with the base in a blowout rather than persuade swing voters in a nail-biter.
It was a supremely cocky move by Trump, considering the fact that JD Vance is a fraud, devoid of personality, a walking pile of human butthair who brings exactly nothing to the ticket besides maybe some hardcore base donor money. We guess perhaps a couple of old chairborne racists might see their younger selves in JD and be slightly more motivated to ask their kids to come over and help them fill out the absentee ballot. (Their kids will not answer their calls.) But those people were voting for Trump anyway.
A couple moments from JD’s public appearances last night illustrate just what an absolute zero he is. Let’s start with Diet Mountain Dew: is it racist, or is it good to drink?
VANCE: It is the weirdest thing to me, Democrats say that it is racist to believe — well, they say it’s racist to do anything. I had a Diet Mountain Dew yesterday, and one today, I’m sure they’re going to call that racist too.
[large pause]
It’s good!
HA HA HA HA HA
I love you guys!
HA HA HA HA HA
Totally cracked himself up there.
We must emphasize that the “HA HA HA HA HA” was in the transcript, and it was uttered by Vance, twice, and not by his audience. This is important, because in no way did the audience give him any sort of positive feedback that should have suggested that he should tell them he loved them.
There were chuckles, sure, but nobody threw their MAGA panties at his beard or anything.
It was so awkward.
And that is why people are comparing it to the famous Jeb! Bush “Please clap” moment, one of the many moments that sank Jeb!’s candidacy against *checks history books* Donald Trump.
Meidas Touch made the side-by-side video:
Bless.
Fact is, people are not likely to say JD Vance drinking Diet Mountain Dew is racist. There are things he could say about it that could be racist, but his own soft drink choices are pretty much his business.
When people say things are racist, they usually mean things like this, where JD Vance is being a total fucking racist:
VANCE: [Harris] said a couple days ago that I showed no loyalty to the United States, that I have no loyalty to the United States. Well you know, I don’t know Kamala, I served in the United States Marine Corps, and I built a business, what the hell have you done other than collect a government check for the past 20 years?
Vicious little Birth of a Nation extra, isn’t he?
Of course, many have noted that all civil servants “collect a government check,” and so do members of the United States armed forces, of which JD was once a member, as he made sure to tell us. And they’ve noted that Harris was “collecting a government check” as a prosecutor and an attorney general and as a senator and as the vice president.
But those kinds of gotchas aren’t the point, because when a pigfuck racist like JD Vance says “collect a government check” about a Black woman, it’s a dogwhistle that activates the Dead Rush Limbaugh “welfare queen” rage/pleasure button in the brains of the pigfuck racists in the audience.
Nothing more, nothing less.
So, if you’re keeping score at home:
Diet Mountain Dew clip: not racist. Pathetic and sad and very JEB! though.
Second clip: holy fuck racist.
JD Vance: creepy weird white supremacist piece of shit who also happens to be awkward, unrelatable, and a complete fraud.
In summary and in conclusion, here is a clip of JD sitting next to Trump, fawning over him and making weird forced laugh sounds at Trump’s jokes like it’s the most unnatural thing he’s ever done.
Cool.
We’re going to kick their asses in November.
[Atlantic / videos via Aaron Rupar / Meidas Touch / Acyn]
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re-posting because apropos:
Andy Beshear commenting on JD Vance:
“I mean, the problem with JD Vance is he has no conviction, but I guess his running mate has 34,”
I'd like to point out that what he said was worse than you made it sound. He didn't say the VP hasn't done anything but "drawing a government paycheck" while implying that she's a welfare queen, he said the VP has been "drawing a government check". In poor people parlance, "drawing a check" -which is what he actually said- literally means collecting a cash benefit such as AFDC or SSDI (or whatever those programs are called now). "Drawing a paycheck" on the other hand, is a noble thing, because a paycheck is earned through labor. This is a subtle but important distinction.
My poor person ears (I am no longer poor, but I still think like a poor person and probably always will) heard him tell a bald faced lie, his audience heard it and loved it because they enjoy the little racist bells that it made jingle just for them.