Kristi Noem Embarrassment Week Will Be Over When Kristi Noem Stops Embarrassing Herself

No time soon, we reckon.

May 13, 2024

We were worried the Kristi Noem daily embarrassment show might be over after she canceled her book tour and slithered back to South Dakota to think about all the things she had done wrong. But nah! She did that just as people were starting to read the physical book.

Turns out North Korea isn’t the only country whose leader Noem has fantasized about/hallucinated/wholly invented interactions with. She also thinks she was fixin’ to meet with the leader of France, Emmanuel Macron, up until she decided she didn’t want to do that anymore, on account of something he said.

Did this happen?

Non.

NBC News reports on a passage in Noem’s book Things I Did In The Gravel Pit, where she says she canceled on Macron when she was in France back in 2023. (You know how world leaders are always like “Bring me the the redneck that runs one of the Dakotas.”) What she says happened:

"While in Paris, I was slated to meet with French president Emmanuel Macron," Noem wrote in her book "No Going Back." "However, the day before we were to meet he made what I considered a very pro-Hamas and anti-Israel comment to the press. So, I decided to cancel."

She decided to cancel.

Except … nah.

A representative from the Élysée Palace disputed Noem's account, saying there’s no record of a scheduled meeting, nor was there an invitation extended to her.
When reached for comment Friday, a spokesperson for Noem said that “the Governor was invited to sit in President Macron’s box for the Armistice Day Parade at Arc de Triomphe.”

It was the literal least the French could do, sounds like. They found out some idiot red state governor was going to be in town. Sure, let ‘em sit in the box. Bonjour, etc.

As Noem’s own spox admits, Macron did not show up that day. And as NBC News reports, Noem didn’t even specify in her book what Macron said that allegedly pissed her off so much she canceled the personal invitation we guess she hallucinated, or just made up. NBC News tried to find out:

When asked for details, Noem's office on Friday pointed to Macron's remarks urging Israel to stop bombing Gaza and calling for a cease-fire. Macron also condemned Hamas, as well as its Oct. 7 attack on Israel, and recognized "the right of Israel to protect itself and react."

Well OK, whatever, Kristi Noem.

Hard choices and so forth.

Oh wait, that’s the name of Hillary Clinton’s book.

And her books wasn’t full of shit and lies.

And she didn’t murder any dogs in it.

Now that’s a book worth reading!

[NBC News]