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Patriotism Fails Local Football Team


Last night's Redskins opener was a tasteful, sober celebration of the quiet dignity of American patriotism -- just kiddin'! There was flags-a-plenty and Lee Greenwood on the loudspeakers!

Distributing flags to some 90,000 "greater Washington area" football fans who are rabid to start a promising season on the anniversary of 9/11 is a recipe for kitschy patriotism of the highest order. Intern Nick documented the vigorous flag wavin', but had to end the recording before the spontaneous "U-S-A, U-S-A" chants began, because some things shouldn't be shown even on the internet.

Despite having God and Country on their side, the Indiginous Americans lost by 3 to the Nordic Sailors.

After the jump, a big picture of Tom Cruise at the game with his scary robot wife and a child who might be his son.

cruiseskins.jpgPhoto: AP

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The Dumb Song Of J. Dinesh Prufrock

A quick Dear Shitferbrains for you smart kids today, in response to our recent piece on Dinesh D'Souza's continued insistence that historian Kevin M. Kruse please bitchslap him with facts again and again. It turns out we picked the wrong historian to lionize, according to "Hadding Scott," who dropped by to let us know we had foolishly referred to a mere Princeton professor instead of to the most comprehensive take-down-er of D'Souza's lies, "Hadding Scott" himself.

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Among the primary results from Tuesday that we didn't report: Chris Murphy, US Senator from Connecticut, managed to hold on to the Democratic nomination for a second term. Actually, if you want to get all technical about it, he didn't win the nom Tuesday -- he'd already been nominated at the state party convention in May, and the Dem primary was cancelled since Murphy was the only one to file. Murphy's also heavily favored to win reelection this fall. The biggest question for Murphy is whether he's hoping to seek some other office in a couple years. (As if any prominent Democratic senator hasn't already mentally compared their inaugural crowd size to Trump's.)

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