Pennsylvania Strangler Doesn't Need Hastert
How hard has the Mark Foley Cocktober Surprise hit the Republicans right now? It's made two of their congressional leaders so radioactive that Don "Sometimes You Gotta Strangle a Bitch" Sherwood doesn't want them campaigning for him.
Denny "Wheezing Past the Graveyard" Hastert and Tom "No Funny Nickname Immediately Suggests Itself" Reynolds are both acknowledged by Americans with brains as being responsible for a half-assed coverup of Mark "Measure It" Foley's dirty deeds. They were both scheduled to campaign for Sherwood, but, uh, then they sorta canceled due to "scheduling conflicts." Like, "the election is scheduled for four weeks from now and the NRCC is sending me the two biggest liabilities in a House full of hilarious liabilities." Also it's hard to fit "pedophile" and "adultrous strangler" on a single banner.
This is the man for whom a visit from Dick "Least-Liked Human Being in the History of America" Cheney was a welcome respite from, you know, the "Sherwood Denies Choking Woman" headlines. But page-fucking? That won't even play well with Pennsylvania's small-but-vocal pro-strangling bloc.
The Dog Ate My Campaign Appearance [TPMMuckraker]