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Phase One of Evil Metro Fare Increases Coming Sunday

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How much will it cost if you're one of those people who likes to yell at the station workers?DO ANY AND ALL TRAVELING WITHIN THE D.C. AREA THAT YOU WILL NEED TO DO IN YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW. This Sunday socialist death cartel Metro is raising bus and rail fares $0.25 to $0.35. SmarTrip (isn't that cool how they combined the "T," and not dumb at all?) cards have been lowered to $2.50, so that's nice. There will now be DVD kiosks at stations too, so Washingtonians can sneer at suburban moms pulling Paul Blart: Mall Cop out of the machine. And lastly, it was announced 14 people will die and 57 will be injured somewhere on the Blue Line next week. [Washington Post]
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I wasn't ready for Koko the gorilla to die. She was just 46, so still young well past the upper age limit for a gorilla, but I'll miss her. She loved cats, told mildly amusing jokes, and put up with people, so she was a lot like your weird aunt.

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Donald Trump held one of his televised cabinet meetings today in which he railed about the terrible Democrats who forced the current border crisis (at a time when illegal border crossings are actually lower than usual). In what's sure to be his favorite phrase on Twitter for the next few days, Trump blamed "extremist open-border Democrats" for all the problems he brought on himself with his family separation policy, and explained that Democrats were simultaneously hurting illegal immigrants AND the rest of America by forcing Normal America to accept Central Americans who fled to the US. It made loads of sense! And then things got ... less so.

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