News
Kayleigh McEnany: Christ, What An Asshole
And that is all we have to say about that.
September 25, 2020 09:40 AM
God, Kayleigh McEnany is such a full of shit asshole. And a fascist enabler, she is also that.
So, Madam Press Secretary, will you please respond to Donald Trump declaring that he's not going to guarantee a peaceful transfer of power when he loses the election? Jon Karl from ABC News asked the question.
“The president will accept the results of a free and fair election. But I think that your question is more fitting… https://t.co/hq3RG72q2Y— ABC News (@ABC News)1600968720.0
<blockquote><strong>MCENANY: </strong>You are referring to the question asked by the <em>Playboy</em> reporter, right?</blockquote><p>Yeah, because Donald Trump just hates <em>Playboy</em>. Can't even bring himself to read it for the articles. (Haha, there we go, assuming the president can read.)</p><p>But anyway, that wasn't the question, ASSHOLE.</p><p>Karl clarified. And McEnany said:</p><blockquote><strong>MCENANY:</strong> I believe that question asked by the <em>Playboy ...</em></blockquote><p>After making some asshole comments about the "deranged wish of that reporter" — Brian Karem, who is wonderful — for Trump to transfer power even if he wins, which was obviously not the intent of the question, McEnany finally got down to enabling fascism:</p><blockquote><strong>MCENANY: </strong>The president will accept the results of a free and fair election, but I think that your question is more fitting to be asked of Democrats, who have already been on the record saying they won't accept the results of an election ....</blockquote><p>Because everybody fucking despises Donald Trump, he's never had a 50 percent approval rating from a reputable pollster (eat a bag of fuck, Rasmussen), he lost the vote of the people by MILLIONS in 2016, and every election since then has featured hordes of people coming out to vote against Trump, even though he wasn't technically on the ballot. </p><p>That's why we know if he "wins," he didn't really win, ASSHOLE. <em>It's just not mathematically possible if there is a free and fair vote, ASSHOLE.</em></p><p>McEnany went on to say that <em>Donald Trump</em>, pathological liar fascist shitmouth, would decide whether the election has been "fair."</p><p>You know, like fascists do. </p><p>The Daily Beast <a href="https://www.thedailybeast.com/kayleigh-mcenany-grilled-on-trumps-sudden-embrace-of-mail-in-voting?source=articles&via=rss" target="_blank">summarizes</a> that part, because there's enough video of that asshole Kayleigh McEnany in this post already:</p><blockquote>[W]hen she was asked to explain what Trump will consider "free and fair" when he has complained that mail-in ballots should be discarded, she would only say it will be up to the president to decide if he believes the process was "rigged" or not. [...]<br><br>"The president will accept the results of a free and fair election," she repeated. "He will accept the will of the American people."<br><br>"So for clarity, if he loses and it's 'free and fair,' he will accept it?" [NBC's Peter] Alexander asked again.<br><br>"I've answered your question," McEnany replied. "He will accept the results of a free and fair election."</blockquote><p>And will he decide it's a free and fair election when he loses? </p><p>Nope. He already has <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/he-said-it-hes-a-fascist-plan-accordingly" target="_blank">told us that.</a> Indeed, he's been saying it since the 2016 campaign. Because he's a fascist. </p><p>Done with this asshole, the end. </p><p>[<a href="https://www.thedailybeast.com/kayleigh-mcenany-grilled-on-trumps-sudden-embrace-of-mail-in-voting?source=articles&via=rss" target="_blank">Daily Beast</a>]</p><p><strong>Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/evanhurst" target="_blank">RIGHT HERE, DO IT RIGHT HERE!</a></strong></p><p><span style="background-color: initial;"><strong>Did you forget to money somebody? Was it us? Let us help you with that.</strong></span></p><p><span style="background-color: initial;"></span></p><form name="donation" method="post" class="donation-form"><p class="subheadline">How often would you like to donate?</p><div class="form-row row--plan"><label class="plan-type__label"><input type="radio" name="plan_type" value="once" class="plan-type" required="" checked> Just once
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Elections
Florida Man Rick Scott Wants To Throw Away Your Absentee Ballot
If anyone knows about fraud, it's Rick Scott!
September 25, 2020 09:20 AM
Sen. Rick Scott (R-Florida) proudly announced yesterday that, with 40 days to the 2020 election and record numbers of people planning fo vote bey mail because of the pandemic, he'd like to impose a single nationwide standard for tabulating absentee ballots: Only ballots that arrive at local election boards by the end of polling on Election Day would count, and the absentee ballots would all have to be counted within 24 hours in order to be valid. Those are among the provisions in Scott's brainchild, the Verifiable, Orderly, & Timely Election Results (VOTER) Act (GET IT?).
Now, you may scoff at the suggestion that Scott thinks this reeking turd could be passed and enforced before November 3, but his press release sure makes clear he's not just talking about future elections:
We can't wait weeks or months to find out the results of this election or any election in our future – a scenario made all the more likely by the Democrats' push to change laws late in the game and eliminate standards that protect against fraud. The VOTER Act will create uniform standards for voting-by-mail, provide important protections against fraud, and make sure we have a timely federal election result. We need to pass this bill now to ensure a smooth and secure election. [Emphasis added]
Good to see he has a clear, realistic grasp of what can be accomplished in 40 days. That aside, even if Scott were only proposing this for somewhere down the road, it's still a terrible idea that would restrict people from voting, so let's just focus on that, not the absurdity of trying to remake elections while voting is already underway. Though that's still really fuckin' stupid.
<p>Scott's bill relies on Congress's power to set rules for federal elections, so it would probably be able to overrule state laws that treat absentee voting differently. States could still have different rules for state and local elections, but since having two different standards would be costly and confusing, the assumption is that the states would fall in line and change their laws to fit the federal standard. </p><p>The biggest changes Scott's bill demands would require all absentee ballots in federal elections to conform to these standards: </p><ul class="ee-ul"><li>Mail-in ballots would have to be requested no later than 21 days before an election. </li><li>Ballots would have to be returned by the close of polling on Election Day. </li><li>All precincts would have to report the total number of votes, both in-person and by mail, one hour after polls close.</li><li>Counting of absentee ballots could only begin when polls open on election day.</li><li>All ballots would have to be counted and reported within 24 hours of the close of polling. </li><li>It would be illegal for anyone but an immediate relative or a caregiver to possess another person's absentee ballot. That would eliminate the specter of "ballot harvesting" that Republicans think is fraudy and terrible, but which is currently legal in several states. </li></ul><div>In addition, the bill specifies a number of provisions that would be necessary to verify the identity of the voter filling out the ballot and preventing people from voting twice, although virtually all states already require that. </div><p>In his press release, Scott <a href="https://www.rickscott.senate.gov/sen-rick-scott-introduces-voter-act-prevent-election-fraud" target="_blank">says </a>these changes are desperately needed to prevent fraud and to ensure that votes are tabulated quickly and accurately, which all sounds very nice as long as you're one of the lucky duckies whose ballot wasn't caught in the mail even thought it was sent several days before the election.</p><p>And those changes would have a huge impact on elections, invalidating Crom only knows how many absentee ballots, which is after all the point. Nineteen states currently <a href="https://www.ncsl.org/research/elections-and-campaigns/vopp-table-10-who-can-collect-and-return-an-absentee-ballot-other-than-the-voter.aspx" target="_blank">allow absentee ballots to be counted</a> if they arrive after the close of polling, as long as they're postmarked either by Election Day or, in four states, the day before. </p><p>The absentee ballot <em>counting </em>provisions would really be where tons of votes would end up getting tossed. States currently have a <a href="https://www.ncsl.org/research/elections-and-campaigns/vopp-table-16-when-absentee-mail-ballot-processing-and-counting-can-begin.aspx" target="_blank">wide variety of arrangements</a> for processing absentee ballots, particularly for the labor-intensive work of verifying signatures on the ballot or security envelope. Several states allow for absentee ballot processing to begin well before Election Day, and some even allow the votes to be tabulated in advance, as long as the results aren't released prior to close of polling. With the expected increase in voting by mail, that advance processing is going to be especially important to get timely vote counts this year. </p><p>The<a href="https://www.rickscott.senate.gov/sites/default/files/2020-09/KEL20782_0.pdf" target="_blank"> text of Scott's bill</a> doesn't <em>appear </em>to address when such processing can begin, but it wouldn't allow any advance <em>tabulation </em>of absentee votes. A lot counts on what he means by "counted" here: </p><blockquote>Mail-in ballots received prior to the date of 10 the election shall be counted beginning at the time polls open on the date of the election.</blockquote><p>An election law Scott signed when he was governor of Florida, for instance, <a href="https://twitter.com/daveweigel/status/1309191970011701252" target="_blank">allows early processing</a> of absentee ballots up to 22 days before election day. if the intent here is to cram both processing <em>and </em>tabulation into Election Day plus 24 hours from the close of polling, that would be a clusterfuck of massive proportions. The five states that currently run their elections entirely by mail — and have done so without a hitch, for years — all <a href="https://www.ncsl.org/research/elections-and-campaigns/vopp-table-16-when-absentee-mail-ballot-processing-and-counting-can-begin.aspx" target="_blank">allow ballots to be processed and tabulated</a> in advance of Election Day. </p><p>A spokesperson for Scott's office <a href="https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2020/09/republican-senator-bill-illegal-mail-vote-count-deadline.html" target="_blank">told Slate t</a>hat's tough: "Any conflicting state laws would be preempted," so let's take this thing that works and break it. </p><p>That 24-hour deadline for counting and reporting all ballots is clearly a reaction to the 2018 midterm, in which the full results of the election weren't known in some states until several days later, when all the votes were tallied. Scott's bill is designed to lock in incomplete results, and given that a full count of the vote swung a number of congressional seats from Republican to Democrat, we can see why Scott would want to impose that artificial deadline. Also not a surprise: Scott's bill <a href="https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2020/09/republican-senator-bill-illegal-mail-vote-count-deadline.html" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">doesn't include a penny of funding</a> to help states meet the ridiculous new deadlines.</p><p>Despite Republican whining about slow vote tallies, there's just <a href="https://www.latimes.com/opinion/editorials/la-ed-vote-counting-20181116-story.html" target="_blank">no evidence at all of fraud</a>. It simply takes a while to count all the ballots. Scott's bill would literally result in possibly millions of votes simply being ignored. The possibilities for electoral fuckery are obvious, too — if the early returns look good for one party, that's a heck of an incentive to <a href="https://twitter.com/StevenTDennis/status/1309191421451272192" target="_blank">slow the count </a>of absentee votes. Oops, sorry, didn't get to those, but the winner's been decided. </p><p>As for the new Republican battle cry that absentee votes are fraudulent (at least if they're not for Republicans), FBI Director Christopher Wray<a href="https://www.axios.com/mail-in-voting-2020-election-christopher-wray-8ba5f3dc-1e5d-4c48-a0c1-4a5fd2ece3aa.html" target="_blank"> testified to Congress</a> yesterday that the FBI has simply "not seen, historically, any kind of coordinated national voter fraud effort in a major election, whether it's by mail or otherwise." </p><p>Sure, there are some fraudy cheaters out there, but such fuckery tends to occur only on a small scale, like the Republican operative in <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/nc-9-the-good-son-and-the-evil-dad-who-wanted-to-win-more-than-anything" target="_blank">North Carolina's 2018 election</a> who submitted just enough fraudulent absentee ballots to change the outcome in a congressional race. And like that case, most attempts at fraud are so sloppy they're easily detected. </p><p>There's simply no reason to massively change how we do absentee voting. Apart, you know, from ensuring a Republican advantage, since full tabulation of the vote in recent elections has<a href="https://www.axios.com/mail-in-voting-2020-election-christopher-wray-8ba5f3dc-1e5d-4c48-a0c1-4a5fd2ece3aa.html" target="_blank"> tended to result in a "blue shift"</a> from early, <em>incomplete </em>election results. But Rick Scott knows all about fraud; never forget that the healthcare corporation he ran was<a href="https://www.wonkette.com/lets-put-medicare-frauding-florida-gov-rick-scott-in-charge-of-medicare-oh-yeah-baby" target="_blank"> guilty of massive Medicare fraud,</a> although he himself avoided charges. </p><p>Definitely the guy you want setting the rules for elections. Is that an ad hominem argument? Maybe a little — but in this case, the hominid is pretty fucking awful. </p><p>[<a href="https://www.rickscott.senate.gov/sen-rick-scott-introduces-voter-act-prevent-election-fraud" target="_blank">Rick Scott</a> / <a href="https://www.rickscott.senate.gov/sites/default/files/2020-09/KEL20782_0.pdf" target="_blank">VOTER Act</a> / <a href="https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2020/09/republican-senator-bill-illegal-mail-vote-count-deadline.html" target="_blank">Slate </a>/ <a href="https://www.axios.com/mail-in-voting-2020-election-christopher-wray-8ba5f3dc-1e5d-4c48-a0c1-4a5fd2ece3aa.html" target="_blank">Atlantic</a> / <a href="https://www.latimes.com/opinion/editorials/la-ed-vote-counting-20181116-story.html" target="_blank">LAT</a> / <a href="https://www.axios.com/mail-in-voting-2020-election-christopher-wray-8ba5f3dc-1e5d-4c48-a0c1-4a5fd2ece3aa.html" target="_blank">Axios</a>]</p><p>Yr Wonkette is entirely funded by reader donations. Please help us keep this little mommyblog keep humming along — your donation will be counted as soon as it arrives! </p><p></p><p><a href="https://amzn.to/33mKzZe" target="_blank">Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons</a>.</p><p></p><p></p><form name="donation" method="post" class="donation-form"><p class="subheadline">How often would you like to donate?</p><div class="form-row row--plan"><label class="plan-type__label"><input type="radio" name="plan_type" value="once" class="plan-type" required="" checked> Just once
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News
Click Here If You Hate Lindsey Graham's Guts!
A blog post of joy!
September 24, 2020 04:30 PM
Lindsey Graham is upset, y'all.
No, not the kind of upset where his face gets all red and his eyes bug out and he expresses his anal glands and starts sweat-screaming on the Senate floor about how everybody is ruining Brett Kavanaugh's life. That's pretty funny, but Lindsey is a different kind of upset.
He's BROKE upset, because he ain't go no money! And he's SAD upset, because everybody HATE HIS GUTS.
All of this brings us joy.
Graham went on "Fox & Friends" today, for bellyaching purposes. You will want to watch this video in a chair where you have freedom of movement to slap your knees and giggle a lot about Lindsey's pain.
<div id="9cb2f" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f2f84c13a50b42c1dd34e12138fc02e0"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet twitter-custom-tweet" data-twitter-tweet-id="1309171806360743936" data-partner="rebelmouse"><div style="margin:1em 0">“I’m being killed financially. This money is because they hate my guts,” Sen. Lindsey Graham who’s neck and neck wi… https://t.co/bIz2K06fN7</div> — Shannon Watts (@Shannon Watts)<a href="https://twitter.com/shannonrwatts/statuses/1309171806360743936">1600965856.0</a></blockquote></div><p>In that clip, Lindsey whines that his opponent Jaime Harrison (<a href="https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_harrison_fr_q12019_jaime-a?refcode=MS_AD_D-DD_2019.03.08_X_GG_KW__X__eyJjcmVhdGl2ZSI6IkJlYXQgR3JhaGFtIiwiYXVkaWVuY2UiOiJKYWltZUhhcnJpc29uIn0&recurring=TRUE&gclid=CjwKCAjwh7H7BRBBEiwAPXjadoPW0Pfah1_sKBm_j3HviOPTdm2QNc0dJJ86oACRDbhkDFwb0hwovhoCVecQAvD_BwE" target="_blank">DONATE HIM</a>) is going to raise $100 million dollars. He whines that Harrison (<a href="https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_harrison_fr_q12019_jaime-a?refcode=MS_AD_D-DD_2019.03.08_X_GG_KW__X__eyJjcmVhdGl2ZSI6IkJlYXQgR3JhaGFtIiwiYXVkaWVuY2UiOiJKYWltZUhhcnJpc29uIn0&recurring=TRUE&gclid=CjwKCAjwh7H7BRBBEiwAPXjadoPW0Pfah1_sKBm_j3HviOPTdm2QNc0dJJ86oACRDbhkDFwb0hwovhoCVecQAvD_BwE" target="_blank">PUT MONEY IN HIS BRASSIERE!</a>) raised $6 million in the hours after Ruth Bader Ginsburg's death. </p><blockquote><strong>GRAHAM:</strong> I AM BEING KILLED FINANCIALLY. THIS MONEY IS BECAUSE THEY HATE MY GUTS.</blockquote><p>That is true, Lindsey Graham, everybody is giving dollars to Jaime Harrison (<a href="https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_harrison_fr_q12019_jaime-a?refcode=MS_AD_D-DD_2019.03.08_X_GG_KW__X__eyJjcmVhdGl2ZSI6IkJlYXQgR3JhaGFtIiwiYXVkaWVuY2UiOiJKYWltZUhhcnJpc29uIn0&recurring=TRUE&gclid=CjwKCAjwh7H7BRBBEiwAPXjadoPW0Pfah1_sKBm_j3HviOPTdm2QNc0dJJ86oACRDbhkDFwb0hwovhoCVecQAvD_BwE" target="_blank">PUT A HUNDY IN JAIME HARRISON'S FACE!</a>) because they hate Lindsey Graham right in his guts. </p><p>If Lindsey Graham experiencing what it is like to have somebody hate his guts to his face brings you unfettered joy, and if you really like the idea of Graham's career being one of the casualties of the 2020 election, go <a href="https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_harrison_fr_q12019_jaime-a?refcode=MS_AD_D-DD_2019.03.08_X_GG_KW__X__eyJjcmVhdGl2ZSI6IkJlYXQgR3JhaGFtIiwiYXVkaWVuY2UiOiJKYWltZUhhcnJpc29uIn0&recurring=TRUE&gclid=CjwKCAjwh7H7BRBBEiwAPXjadoPW0Pfah1_sKBm_j3HviOPTdm2QNc0dJJ86oACRDbhkDFwb0hwovhoCVecQAvD_BwE" target="_blank">contribute to Lindsey Graham's sadness and 2021 unemployment! </a></p><p>According to <a href="https://projects.fivethirtyeight.com/polls/south-carolina/" target="_blank">recent polls</a> — good polls — Harrison and Graham are <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/come-and-get-your-poll-porn" target="_blank">neck and neck.</a> </p><p>And while you're at it, spread some love around.</p><p><a href="https://projects.fivethirtyeight.com/polls/senate/" target="_blank">Just today,</a> good polls have <a href="https://secure.actblue.com/donate/tg-search-q3?gpsid=35_102_15260&refcode=gpsGLSad20_200922_search_d2d_gq_infoskrs__&utm_campaign=gpsGLSad20_200922_search_d2d_gq_infoskrs__&utm_medium=ads&utm_source=tgreen&gclid=CjwKCAjwh7H7BRBBEiwAPXjadg7vRMfhd-IJsykH3oEVNg0fkYaEzrYqhgevwc3rGUKxqLoTfM7oQxoCOz0QAvD_BwE" target="_blank">Theresa Greenfield</a> up a point or three over Joni Ernst, <a href="https://secure.actblue.com/donate/senatecircleks" target="_blank">Barbara Bollier</a> is even with gross GOP fucker Roger Marshall in Kansas, and adorable doll-faced <a href="https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_fr_ossoff_q32019_dd_senateblue_a?refcode=MS_AD_D-DD_2019.09.09_X_GG_KW__X__eyJjcmVhdGl2ZSI6IkRvbmF0ZSAkNSIsImF1ZGllbmNlIjoiT0ZTIn0&recurring=TRUE&gclid=CjwKCAjwh7H7BRBBEiwAPXjadjABsBlWQduW80qHQgCkzhgH-1Xplkg_Ct_4tlsObTresA0ktF3mdBoCkLYQAvD_BwE" target="_blank">Jon Ossoff</a> is either tied or just a couple points down against gross GOP fucker David Perdue in Georgia. (If any race needs more love right now, it is OSSOFF. We can win that one.)</p><p>Those links? They are for HURL MONEY AT THESE PEOPLE SO HARD THEY ARE LIKE OW OW OW OW, STOP! WHAT ARE THOSE, <em>ROLLS OF QUARTERS</em>?</p><p>Do not throw rolls of quarters at them! It is considered highly impolite. Use your credit or debit card, like a civilized person.</p><p>In summary and in conclusion, Lindsey Graham is upset and that just makes you more motivated.</p><p>OPEN THREAD.</p><p><strong>Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/evanhurst" target="_blank">RIGHT HERE, DO IT RIGHT HERE!</a></strong></p><p><span style="background-color: initial;"><strong>Did you forget to money somebody? Was it us? 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justice department
Justice Department Is Melania's Personal Lawyer Too Now We Guess!
Isn't that what they're there for?
September 24, 2020 04:06 PM
In today's edition of They're Using My Tax Dollars For What Now!, the Daily Beast is reporting that the Justice Department tried to intimidate Melania's former BFF Stephanie Winston Wolkoff into stopping her from publishing a book about her friendship with the First Lady. Because what is the Justice Department's Civil Division for if not to save Her Contouredness from embarrassment, right?
On July 8, the day after the Beast broke the news that Wolkoff's book release was imminent, she got a nastygram from Trump's longtime personal lawyer Marc Kasowitz informing her that she was in violation of a gratuitous services agreement signed when she began "working" at the White House. A gratuitous services agreement is a labor contract where the "employee" is actually a volunteer, donating her time gratis. Because when Wolkoff closed down her event planning business to go work in the White House, she did it for free.
Whether this is because the First Daughter was hogging all the "First Family" budget is unclear. It's also unclear how the Trump family would have standing to enforce a contract between Wolkoff and the federal government. But it's certainly on brand for the Trump family to get shit for nothing, then turn around and kick the poor chumps who were stupid enough to give it to them.
In her book Melania and Me: The Rise and Fall of My Friendship With The First Lady, Wolkoff paints a damning portrait of the Trump family deliberately hanging her out to dry when the eleventy investigations into financial improprieties at the Trump inauguration became public in February of 2018. She left the White House that month, and according to the Beast, her gratuitous services agreement expired after two years, leaving her free to speak her piece in 2020. And unlike John Bolton, she had no security clearance, so she doesn't have to get a permission slip from the government.
Which didn't stop Bill Barr's henchmen from tryin' it. The week after she got whizzed on by Kasowitz, the acting head of the Justice Department's Civil Division sent her a letter of his own.
"If these reports are true, the book appears to contain government information that Ms. Wolkoff expressly promised to not disclose. Please confirm immediately, but no later than July 17, that Ms. Wolkoff's book will not contain any information covered by the agreement. If you are unable to do so, the government will pursue all available legal remedies," wrote Ethan Davis, who replaced longtime Civil Division attorney Jody Hunt this summer when Attorney General Bill Barr went off the rails and a whole spate of experienced DOJ hands started rushing the exits.
Hey, remember when Barr tried to get SDNY head Geoffrey Berman out of the way by offering to let him lead the Civil Division? Good times! In the event, Davis himself wasn't long in the job, leaving the Department entirely on September 7. But before he left, he did Trump a favor, though, and tried to wield the power of the federal government to get a book about the First Lady killed. Career high, dude!
But like everything else Trump moved on like a bitch, he just couldn't get there. Stephanie Winston Wolkoff's book is out. Mary Trump's book is out. Michael Cohen's book is out. John Bolton's book is out. And the White House leaks like a bloody sieve, and Trump can't scratch his saggy balls without 10 reporters getting a text about it. Sad!
Anyway, enjoy this video of Wolkoff 'splaining to Rachel Maddow that she's got tapes, and "the last thing they should be doing is come after me."
"Melania and the White House had accused me of criminal activity, and publicly shamed and fired me, and made me the… https://t.co/4giLz92UVT— Maddow Blog (@Maddow Blog)1599012164.0
Take 'em down, Ma'am.
[Beast]
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