My dear ones! We have met your wonderful comrades in Long Beach, CA; Reno, Nevada; and Bend, Oregon, and all of them were just as lovely (and handsome!) as we could have wished. Now, Portland and Spokane, we have chosen the venues in which you let us buy you beer and pizza, because both of those places are on our way home!

Portland, you are Thurs., Feb. 15, 6:30-8:30 at the Lucky Labrador Beer Hall — this is the QUIMBY location, in Northwest! 1945 NW Quimby St, Portland, OR 97209.

Spokane! You are Fri., Feb. 16, 6-8 p.m. at South Perry Pizza, 1011 S. Perry St., Spokane!

Will we ever make it to the South or East Coast? Every time we think about you darlings in Texas, we remember your hurricane season is now 11 months out of every year. And the East Coast, well, you're cold right now. But we'll get back to you again eventually, we swear!

UPDATE! Just by accident, we seem to have found the best pizza restaurant in all of Portland: Last year, the outnumbered staff 86ed a group of Nazis despite slurs and deathly bagpipes. Yes, bagpipes. Fucking nazis.

Just remember: money talks.

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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Seattle People, looking spunky. We hate spunky.

It is Friday, Yr Wonkette's back end (that's website talk) has been cranky all afternoon like a digital babby that needs a nap, and we are all stuck in the stupidest timeline. The one way we know it's not actually hell is that there are still adorable doggies and kitties and sloths, no to mention toddlers preschoolers named Donna Rose, and of course you, you lovely wonderful readers of ourn. And if you're in Eastern Washington or its environs, you can come out to meet Yr Editrix, Yr Shypixel, and Yr one day Benevolent Monarch Donna Rose come this Sunday in the Evergreen State's second-largest city, Spokane!

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  • Saturday, Aug 11th ....... Seattle, WA
    Discovery Park, 4-7pm
  • Sunday, Aug 12th ....... Bellingham, WA
    Sunnyland Park, 2-5pm
  • Sunday, Aug 19th ....... Spokane, WA
    Audubon Park, 2-5pm

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