President Bush Seeks Poll Bounce Through Osmosis

autistickid.jpgToday, the President travelled to Rochester, NY, where he was met on the airport tarmac by local hero Jason McElwain--the 17-year old senior from Greece-Athena High School with high-functioning autism who came off the bench for his varsity hoops team a few weeks ago and proceeded to rain down the most bizzonkulous barrage of three-point insanity you have ever seen in what should stand as the most cockle-warmingest story of 2006.

Bush showed laudable deference standing next to someone who's actually polling through the roof:

"But our country was captivated by your amazing story on the basketball court. I think it's a story of Coach Johnson's willingness to give a person a chance. It's a story of Dave and Debbie's deep love for their son, and it's a story of a young man who found his touch on the basketball court, which in turn, touched the hearts of citizens all across the country."

Of course, across the nation, special-education students are expected to perform to the level of their mainstream peers on standardized tests that are tied to No Child Left Behind funding, and, when they fail to do so, those schools are punished. But I guess that's another story.

Later, Bush remarks:

THE PRESIDENT: Saw it on TV. Saw it on TV and I wept, just like a lot of other people. It's just one of those stories that touched a lot of people's hearts.

Q Did somebody play it for you, or did you just see it?

THE PRESIDENT: I can't remember exactly how it happened. Probably somebody played it for me, you know, being the President and all. But it's a wonderful tale.

Hey! Maybe Bush watched it on that magical television that broadcast the first plane hitting the World Trade Center!

The JJ Redick It's Okay To Like [Deadspin]


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