President Obama Hopes All The Jewishes Starve Good
Anti-Christ or anti-Semite or all of 'em Katie?
President Obama, what have you done now? Oh, you've issued a statement from Hillary's AOL home brewer fax beeper, to briefly acknowledge the holiest day in the Jewish calendar, even though all the conservative fundamentalists who can't wait for all the Hebrews to hurry up and get out so Jesus will come back and they will burn in hell say YOU are the anti-Semitic one. (They are wrong, and also assholes, and fuck them, they can kiss our Jewish tuches.*)
Make with the statement, President Obama:
As Jews across America, Israel, and the world gather for the sacred service of Kol Nidre, Michelle and I extend our wishes for an easy fast to all those observing Yom Kippur. The Day of Atonement is a time for humility, reflection and repentance, a chance to be honest with ourselves and one another about our shortcomings. Yet Yom Kippur is also a day of hope. Through our prayers and through our actions, as individuals and as a community, we can better bridge the realities of our world with the ideals and values we share. On this special day, may our common humanity unite us, and may our common faith in a better future inspire us to continue healing our world. G’mar Chatimah Tovah.
And not even a single mention of Jesus, GAHHHH, why do you hate America, Obama, yadda yadda? Gonna report you to the Jew-monitoring authorities like Rep. Steve "America is a Christian nation" King and the original one-L, Michele Bachmann, who's probably still very disappointed in us Jews, for Jewing all wrong, for Obama, and we still do not give a fuck.
Meanwhile, Sen. Marco Rubio, who loves religious liberty and hearts Israel, is attending a fundraiser for his doomed presidential campaign. And it sure sounds fun!
Debbie Wasserman Schultz wants Marco Rubio to cancel his presidential fundraiser Tuesday evening at the home of a real estate investor who has collected art from Adolf Hitler and who also owns a signed copy of "Mein Kampf." There is "really no excuse," she said in a statement released through the Democratic National Committee, calling the event "tasteless."
Oooh, Hitler art! What a blast! And so timely too. And yes, obligatory disclaimer, we think DNC chair and Florida Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz can be pretty tasteless too, to be honest, and not just because she's ambitious, which is very unladylike if you are a lady politician.
While we don't think Rubio is that overtly anti-Semitic or personally cherishes the artistic work of Adolf Hitler -- though it would be irresponsible not to speculate, so feel free to do that -- gotta say The Optics are less than ideal. One might even go so far as to be a real dick about it and quote Rubio back to himself, by reminding him of that time he said, "It is important for us to have a presidency that restores dignity and class to the White House." Because pallin' around with a Hitler fanboy (yeah "collector," whatever) on this, Kol Nidre, the eve of the Jewish Day of Atonement, and then refusing to comment, is a real Not Classy move. At least we know where Donald Trump stands on Hitler. Plus, he lets us count his money, so Jews for Trump, definitely.**
*Sorry, that was rude, but gotta make sure we have something to atone for next year. Also, not sorry.
**But not, obviously, because we're all a bunch of liberal socialist Obama-lovers. As you know.