Presidential Comparisons: Without Lamps, There'd Be No Light

duckie!We love anything that takes the complex and sophisticated coverage normally given to presidential candidates and reduces it into nice, simple, easy-to-understand media shorthand. Because it's not like the press already does that. The Black Table does the hard work for us, mapping each candidate onto the appropriate John Hughes character.

· Gen. Wesley Clark: Brian Johnson (The Brain) from The Breakfast Club

· Rev. Al Sharpton: Long Duk Dong in Sixteen Candles

· Gov. Howard Dean: Duckie from Pretty in Pink

· Sen. Joe Lieberman: The Dad from Sixteen Candles

· Sen. John Kerry: Principal Vernon from The Breakfast Club

· Rep. Dennis Kucinich: The Geek in Sixteen Candles

What's hard to understand here is how two different presidential candidates can both stand in for Anthony Michael Hall. It's not like Hall was really stretching when he went from playing "the Geek" in Sixteen Candles to playing the "the Brain" in The Breakfast Club. We encourage future metaphoricalogists to reach, if necessary, beyond the (admittedly rich) Hughes oeuvre. Action and/or horror flicks, perhaps? We'll get you started. . . Clark: Clearly, the Terminator (Cybernetically programmed to run for president). Kucinich: The dwarf from Willow. Dean: Dr. Giggles! (He's a doctor, he's insane. . . )

Presidential Candidates? They Look Like Brat Packers To Us. [The Black Table]


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