Racism Week At Wonkette Rolls On


So turns out that George Allen's not the only casually ignorant fella involved in the Virginia senate race. Meet Jim Webb Jr., Democratic candidate Jim Webb's son. He's a Marine. He's 24. He likes hideous MySpace skins. He also likes porn:

As the official purchaser of porn in the 'support this friggin Marine program'. You are not only the provider of pornagraphic paraphenalia, to this individual friggin Marine, but a whole Platoon of friggin Marines, waiting to be supported by someone like you, the General Public. But please, no midget or goat porn.

No, just straightforward classic American cheesecake:

Any sexy ladies want to mail inquire within ;) I mean it seriously would be a giant benefit to the country. No one has to know, it can just be a really cool dirty little secret.

Don't get him started on the Chinese, though, those slanty-eyed fishing trip-ruiners from the mysterious Orient:

Right above the reel it read "made in china." 'Confucious say, cheaply made rod make expensive catch.' Zebco is made in china now?! Holy crap! This wholesome everyday American product, is now relegated to manufacture by a bunch of people in China, who will probably NEVER even SEE a lake. Let alone fish one. Infact the 29.95 I paid for my rod, if probably their yearly income (due to the wonderful system that is communism).

It's not so much the casual igorance that gets us as that "Confucius say" jokes stopped being funny when vaudeville died. It's Charlie Chan calling, Jim, and he wants his schtick back. To be fair, the guy's got them Chinamen dead to rights on that point about lakes, though. We give this about 15 minutes before the Webb campaign pulls a "Me So Solly" and shuts Jim Jr.'s MySpace down, so check it out now while you can.

Webb-stah's MySpace

Donate with CC
Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

Keep reading... Show less
Donate with CC

And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter RIGHT NOW, DO IT RIGHT NOW!

Help Wonkette LIVE FOREVER! Seriously, if you can, please help, by making a donation of MONEY.

[Washington Post]

Donate with CC




©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc