Rad Dudes Riot For Totally Good Reason That Isn’t Stupid At All


Skateboarding is not a crime, HENGHHH? Well, that is just obviously true. Except when 1500 rad dudes break a bunch of shops and do Ollies (?) up on people's cars for the totally good reason that isn't stupid at all of not getting into a sold-out movie. Sounds like 500 or so someones should maybe have been told "no" a few times when they were little groms! But how else could the skateboarders have made their displeasure known besides wilding like it is the '80s at the Puerto Rico Day Parade?

  • Smoked a joint, gone home, didn't riot.
  • Smoked a joint, went and got a pizza, didn't riot.
  • Smoked a joint, sat on the curb, called their mom to pick them up, didn't riot.
  • Smoked a joint, did anything besides riot.
  • Hung out outside the 7-Eleven and asked grown-ups to buy them beer. Forgot to riot.

You dudes might wanna read up on "Anarchy" a little bit too. It mostly has to do with social justice and stuff and not really that much about your right to scratch up people's old beater Camrys because you didn't get to see "Bake and Destroy." Here, dudes, read some Wik!

Boring right? You rad dudes probly don't even want to be Anarchists anymore. But have you considered a life as a Repo Man? It's always intense.


Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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