Senate Republicans Stand Up For Ladies' Right To Be Paid Unfairly
Ladies of America, are you feeling that warm reassurance you get from having manly champions who will fight for you in the halls of power? Pack your sunglasses because no matter what the weather, a sickly orange glow of self-congratulation will be coming your way from the Senate Republicans following their fourth consecutive filibuster of the Paycheck Fairness Act on Monday.
If this latest caucus-block seems like a setback for you Vaginal-Americans, that's only because you don't see that the Democrats are tricking you, using this modest package of reforms designed to ease pay disparity to cover up the fact that Democrats are the real sexists. Have a seat. Mitch will explain. He took the liberty of ordering for you.
At a time when the Obama economy is already hurting women so much, this legislation would double down on job loss, all while lining the pockets of trial lawyers. In other words, it's just another Democratic idea that threatens to hurt the very people that it claims to help.
It's like the Democrats are Warring on Women and no one sees it but the Republicans. Even worse, Democrats are trying to make Republicans look like the bad guys for their brave stand in favor of women's freedom to be paid less, part of a sleazy left-wing strategy to gin up the lady vote for the mid-term elections. Mitch is on to their dirty scheme.
They plan to devote almost all of the remaining time between now and November to what Democrats like to call 'messaging bills.' These are bills designed intentionally to fail so that Democrats can make campaign ads about them failing.
Spinning their failure for all it was worth, Democrats even let Barbara Boxer go to the Senate floor to make the outrageous claim that finding a remedy for the pay gap would help everyone in a naked display of election year pandering to that powerful special-interest group, "people."
The wage gap not only hurts our families, it hurts the economy. If it were reversed, I'd be standing here fighting for the men. It's not right.
That Barbara, she's sneaky! She can say that because she knows she'll probably never have to back it up with a vote, since pay has been consistently tilted in men's favor since the beginning of numbers and the average American woman still only brings in 77 cents for every dollar a man makes for the same work.
The current bill, which Republicans squashed like a big icky bug so you wouldn't have to touch it with your lady hands, is the latest in a series of Democratic initiatives that you women, like regular Americans, would certainly hate if you only understood the issues, like increasing the minimum wage or refinancing student loan debt.
If Democrats really cared about you, the likely female voter demographic, they wouldn't have even held this vote. Republicans would never insult your intelligence by holding "show votes" strictly for effect, knowing the legislation had no chance of becoming law. No gentleman keeps a lady waiting!
You can follow Beth on Twitter, but if you're a guy she'll be busy working 23% later than you.