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Retarded Child Writes To Wonkette

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'Dear shit-fer-brains ...'From: Cindy ___

To: tips@wonkette.com


Date: Wed, Apr 15, 2009 at 5:32 PM

Subject: Neither Democrat or Republican - they both suck!

I am almost old enough to vote and have a lot of questions about what's going on with the government. Republican, Democrat, right, left, what does it all mean? What does each party stand for? When I came to this site I stopped to see what it was about. I found nothing but anger, hate and vulgarity. If this is liberal, NO THANKS! At least the people at the tea parties are trying to make a costructive statement. Lighten up.

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Employees in Donald Trump's White House have the career mortality rate of Bubonic plague victims and are less attractive to future employers. Adding to the body count is Darren Beattie, one of Trump's speechwriters who was fired on Friday. It's a hard gig trying to make the thing currently squatting in the Oval Office sound like a functioning human being. Just take a quick look at Trump's E. coli-infected word salad when removed from a sanity-boosting Twitter format.

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In April of this year, Blake Farenthold, the footie pajama-wearing Texas congressman who once lamented that he couldn't challenge Susan Collins to a duel on account of her not having a penis, resigned from office -- several months after news broke that he had used $84,000 in taxpayer money to settle a sexual harassment suit brought against him by Lauren Greene, his former communications director. In the suit, Greene alleged that the Congressman told her that he had "wet dreams" about her and also informed her that she could show him her nipples. Just, you know, normal stuff like that.

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