Right Wing Extremism

So This Is What The 'Straight Pride Parade' Looks Like. Huh.

Yep. Those sure are some people.

Today, tens of deeply unattractive people and the far-right extremist groups that love them are marching down the streets of Boston to celebrate "Straight Pride." The kind of people who really meant it when they said that same-sex marriage would make them feel less special. Now they are trying to feel special again by trying to pretend that straight people are an "oppressed majority," in a move they hope will teach the left a lesson about why "identity politics" is bad. It would probably have helped if they had any idea what "identity politics" even is. We appear to be past that point by now.

Organizers have said the expect about 1,000 people to come to their little rally, though that does not appear to be the case.

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Culture Wars

MAGA Hat Creeps Must Have Some Weird Kink For Getting Their Asses Kicked By Liberals

MAGA asshole went looking for a fight in Portland and actually found one.

The president of the United States is an asshole. There have probably been other asshole presidents -- we have our suspicions about JFK -- but Donald Trump is the first to govern openly as an asshole. (Except a bunch of the Republicans. But Trump is more.) This has inspired amateur assholes across the nation to flaunt their alternative lifestyle. They put on the red "Make America Great Again" hat Trump wears whenever his Muppet hair misbehaves, and they go out into the world and make asses of themselves. This usually ends poorly.

It seems like they want to get confronted and hassled for wearing a MAGA hat. Maybe it's their way of stepping temporarily into the shoes of people who have a hard time in the world just because they're a minority or queer. Just kidding, nah. They just want to troll the libs and "prove" we're all close-minded, intolerant hypocrites. We guess that's what you do with your free time when sex is firmly off the table.

Last Saturday, a guy in a MAGA hat got his ass kicked outside a Portland, Oregon, bar. PDX hipsters are traditionally more lovers than fighters, but that was before Barack Obama divided the nation. We don't think anyone, even Trump-supporting assholes, should be attacked because of what they're wearing. Period. However, it turns out this particular asshole might've been spoiling for a fight.

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Post-Racial America

Florida Creep Who Killed Black Man Over Parking Spot Will Now Stand His Ground In Prison

Wow, it's as if black lives really matter!

We prefer a world where black men aren't fatally shot in convenience store parking lots, but you can't have everything. So, we're pleased to hear that the trigger-happy asshole who murdered Markeis McGlockton last summer was found guilty of manslaughter.

Michael Drejka tried to use Florida's idiotic "stand your ground" law to justify killing McGlockton in front of his 5-year-old son. Drejka had confronted McGlockton's girlfriend, Britany Jacobs, over whether she'd wrongly parked in a handicapped spot. He wasn't a cop, not even of the Paul Bart variety. McGlockton defended Jacobs from the random loon shouting at her, and when he pushed Drejka to the ground, the creep pulled a gun and shot him dead.

Pinellas County Sheriff Bob Gualtieri declined to charge Drejka because he thought the minor inconvenience he suffered justified cold-blooded murder. Gualtieri didn't personally respond well to the inevitable backlash of protests and calls for a federal investigation. He told Al Sharpton to "go back to New York" and "mind (his) own business," which we don't think has ever worked. Justice started to catch up with Drejka just a few weeks later when the state attorney's office charged him with manslaughter. The state attorney had access to more investigative resources than Gualtieri, and also apparently was in possession of a functioning brain.

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Guess Who's Coming Back To Terrorize Immigrants Some More? It's F*cking Joe Arpaio!


Looks like Joe Arpaio wants to return to the torture and abuse immigrant business! On Sunday night, the convicted and later pardoned felon and former sheriff announced his intention to run for his former job in Maricopa County:

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The DOJ Sent An Anti-Semitic Rant From A White Nationalist Site To Every Immigration Court Worker In America

How awkward for Donald Trump, 'King of Israel!'

Imagine you're an immigration judge. You've just had your coffee and are going about your business on a Monday morning, checking your inbox, when you see your daily news briefing email from the Department of Justice. You click on it, and you see a link to what turns out to be a completely batshit anti-Semitic article about, well, immigration judges like yourself, from a notorious white nationalist site. That would be pretty weird, right?

Well, that is what happened Monday.

BuzzFeed reports that the Justice Department's Executive Office for Immigration Review (EOIR) sent out an email to all immigration court employees that included an article from VDare (archived link), a white nationalist site where they scream about immigrants all day long. The site is named for Virginia Dare, the first English child born in the Americas, to a woman in the Roanoke Colony, and its mission is to protect white people from disappearing, just like the lost colony of Roanoke did. CROATOAN!

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Moscow Mitch Writes Love Song To All The Senate Norms He's F*cked Before

McConnell writes NYT op-ed begging Democrats not to nuke filibuster. Sounds like he's scared.

The New York Times published a work of fiction today from Mitch McConnell. The tortoise who wrecked the Senate passionately defended the legislative filibuster, which he argues plays a "crucial role in our Constitutional order." McConnell isn't just a singularly graceless liar. He also thinks you're stupid.

This is how his fairy tale begins:

" You'll regret this, and you may regret this a lot sooner than you think."

That was my warning to Senate Democrats in November 2013.

Don't you just love a story that kicks off with someone's straight-up gangster declaration? The Godfather at least opened with a wedding. McConnell likes to cast former Democratic leader Harry Reid as the villain who blew up Senate norms so Barack Obama could pack the courts with Castro clones. This isn't what happened. The Republican Senate minority blocked countless Obama executive branch appointments. They were not "controversial," as McConnell claims -- they just weren't right wing hacks. Republicans also used the filibuster to "negotiate" legislative concessions. They were close to demanding protection money from Obama, so Reid went nuclear. McConnell, naturally, takes no responsibility for this. He repeatedly broke his word to Reid and refused to honor previous commitments.

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Ted Cruz So Mad At New York Times You'd Think It Called His Wife Ugly

Haha, it's funny because that was Donald Trump.

Disney villain henchman Ted Cruz is has been having a full-blown Twitter tantrum all week long over the failing New York Times. The Texas senator is pissed because the Times has moved on from accusing Donald Trump of colluding with Russia (as if that's even a real country) to implying that white people once owned black people (wow, if true).

Cruz believes the New York Times is part of a liberal conspiracy to convince Americans that Trump is racist. These diabolical "journalists" will achieve this by covering all the racist things Trump says and does, and because Trump is so damn racist, the Times might have to create a whole new infrastructure to handle all the breaking racist news.

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Internal Memo Tells Republicans To Respond To Far-Right Violence With 'I Know You Are But What Am I?'

So helpful!

Today in Portland, the Proud Boys are holding a rally "To End Domestic Terrorism" and no, they're not planning on disbanding. The violent "Western Chauvinist" street gang says they are rallying to demand that "Antifa" — which is not actually an official organization of any kind — a domestic terrorism threat. The Proud Boys have been known to plan ahead at their rallies, bringing weapons and plotting to start violent incidents they can later blame on Antifa. That is almost definitely what will happen today. Because that's what they do.

There has been a major push on the Right lately to get "Antifa" classified as a terrorist group, not because of anything those associated with the organizing tactic do that would traditionally be classified as "terrorism," but because they so desperately want to be able to play the "both sides!" game. The theory, I am guessing, is that if they can get Antifa classified as a domestic terrorist group, then people won't care when they see statistics about how 73% of all extremism-related murders were classified as coming from the far-right, whereas literally no extremism murders were motivated by a left-wing ideology.

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Tucker Carlson: Everyone Just Calm Down & Wait For The Race War

Tucker, go on Chapo.

Tucker Carlson is an unrepentant racist scumbag. He also reportedly carves his steaks before first allowing them to rest. Last night, Carlson responded like he always does when he airs an especially offensive segment. He whines that the left is trying to "silence him" and then rolls around in his own racist filth. Let's break down his encore performance.

CARLSON: Things are getting dangerously crazy on the Left. How crazy? On Monday, former Jeb Bush spokeswoman Nicolle Wallace explained that President Trump is planning a genocide of Hispanic Americans.

That's not what MSNBC host Nicolle Wallace -- a former Republican -- said. She and USA Today columnist Paul Reyes discussed Donald Trump's use of words such as "invasion" and "infestation" to describe immigrants and how this dehumanizing rhetoric has historically led to the genocide of "undesirables." Carlson claimed Latinos don't mind the extermination talk because they actually dig the president. This is where the TV dinner heir demonstrates his shaky command of math.

CARLSON: Keep in mind, Donald Trump got a higher percentage of the Hispanic vote than Mitt Romney did.

That's a whopping 28 percent to Romney's 27 percent. Or roughly the same.

CARLSON: It turns out that not all Latinos believe in open borders. A lot of them agree with Donald Trump.

Dude, 28 percent is only "a lot" if it's out of 40. The overwhelming majority of Hispanic voters don't like Donald Trump or his racist policies. If you oversampled Candace Owens in a poll, you'd think "a lot" of black people prefer benevolent slavery to the tyranny of freedom.

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New York Times: Where Are The Responsible, Moderate White Supremacists?

NYT saying stuff that makes no goddamned sense again.

The New York Times ran an appropriately sober editorial Sunday, by the whole Editorial Board, condemning white nationalist terrorism and the sorry state of our great nation, and calling on law enforcement and political leaders to do more to fight the hateful ideology. It was a New York Times editorial, as starchy and uprighteous as you'd expect, and starts off by pointing out that if the two mass shootings over the weekend had been perpetrated by Islamic radicals, we'd already be well into a full mobilization of government to fight the jihadists, complete with equivocal regard for civil rights when it came to mosques and online forums.

No American would settle for "thoughts and prayers" as a counterterrorism strategy. No American would accept laying the blame for such an attack on video games[.]

All well and good, and had the editorial been written a day later, it might also have noted that Donald Trump's teleprompter reading exercise would certainly not have stopped at merely calling on all Americans to speak with one voice against Radical Islamic Terror.

It was a perfectly normal New York Times editorial, which made one completely batshit paragraph near the end stick out even more.

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Post-Racial America

PragerU Spreading Absurd Lies About Trump's 'Very Fine People' In Charlottesville

It's more fake news from the right wing hacks at Prager 'University.'

Donald Trump grossly defended white supremacists in Charlottesville, Virginia. We all remember it. It was so objectively awful even average white uncles across the nation were offended, which is why their king and presidential candidate Joe Biden decried Trump's "both sides" BS in his campaign launch video. Biden isn't one for controversial stances unless it's about segregationists.

Charlottesville is a sticking point for conservatives. They must think it's worse than all the countless other racist things Trump has done. Biden at least thinks it's a compelling example for white moderates of Trump's moral unfitness. Maybe this is why the right keeps re-litigating Charlottesville. Right-wing fake university PragerU released a video today called "The Charlottesville Lie." The "lie" CNN commentator Steve Cortes exposes is not Trump's absurd claim that there were "very fine" people on both sides of a Nazi rally. No, the "lie" is the "fake" media's claim that Trump said anything so obviously racist and terrible. We simply didn't see what we saw or hear what we heard. Also, there are five lights. CNN should reconsider the non-fake paychecks it still sends Cortes.

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Post-Racial America

Trump Inspiring White Supremacist Terrorists? Well That Could Not Be!

it's your Sunday Show Rundown!

Welcome to the Sunday show roundup; this one is grim.

The Sunday shows dealt with the aftermath of ANOTHER mass shooting that took place in El Paso, Texas (followed by ANOTHER in Dayton, Ohio). No other Sunday show guest tried harder to contort into pretzels of blame-shifting than former South Carolina representative, Director of the Office of Management and Budget (OMB), Acting White House Chief of Staff and professional fuckmook Mick Mulvaney.

Appearing on ABC's "This Week," he was confronted by Jonathan Karl with the reality of El Paso at least (and presumably Dayton, and presumably Gilroy) being white nationalist terrorism so obvious even (one) Republican had to say so. And it was instigated and ignored by his oddly silent boss on Sunday. Mulvaney wanted you to LOOK OVER THERE:

MULVANEY: It's a fair question I think to ask. Which is, look, did anyone blame Bernie Sanders for the congressional baseball game shooting? No, I don't think so. Did anyone blame Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez for the gentleman -- gentleman -- for the crazy guy who tried to blow up the DHS office in Washington state, taking I think a homemade bomb and an AR-15 to shoot up what he called a concentration camp, the exact same rhetoric that AOC was using? Did anybody blame her? Look, there's -- there's no benefit here to trying to make this a political issue. This is a social issue and we need to address it as -- as that.
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QAnon Way Ahead Of You With Conspiracy Theory About FBI Calling Their Conspiracy Theories A Domestic Terror Threat

I mean, you saw that coming, right?

For the last couple weeks, Ted Cruz has been leading the fight to get Antifa branded as a terrorist organization despite the fact that it isn't actually an organization. Trump himself has recently jumped on that train as well. There are two big problems with this. For one, it's not the president that declares a group a terrorist threat, and for another, unlike right-wing extremists, people who engage in Antifa -- short for anti-fascist -- activities haven't killed anyone or done anything that would traditionally come under the label of terrorism. While punching someone in the face or throwing a milkshake at them is a form of assault, it's not "terrorism."

Alas! It's not Antifa getting that designation, but rather far-right, pro-Trump conspiracy theorists.

A memo published Thursday on Yahoo revealed that the FBI is now considering far-right conspiracy theories like Pizzagate and QAnon to be a domestic terror threat, simply because there have been several actually serious violent incidents and attempted violent incidents in the past few years in which belief in one or more of these theories was a factor.

Sure, "LOL guess who's a domestic terrorist now!" is cathartic, but I'm not at all certain that this designation alone is all that helpful. If they're just slapping a label on these conspiracy communities and not actually doing any follow-up in terms of paying attention to them, their targets and —most importantly — the specific dates they're looking forward to, this might not do much more than feed into the persecution complexes these people already have. Judging by a statement provided to Yahoo by the FBI's national press office, they don't intend on doing any of that:

"While our standard practice is to not comment on specific intelligence products, the FBI routinely shares information with our law enforcement partners in order to assist in protecting the communities they serve," the FBI said.

In its statement, the FBI also said it can "never initiate an investigation based solely on First Amendment protected activity. As with all of our investigations, the FBI can never monitor a website or a social media platform without probable cause."

If there's probable cause to label this a domestic terror threat, how is there not probable cause to find out what these people actually believe and what people or things they see as targets? They're acknowledging that these theories could make certain targets vulnerable, but without any monitoring of websites and social media sites (which are public, by the way), they can't do anything to make these targets more safe in advance of someone going off the rails.

As ridiculous and poisonous as all the QAnon bullshit is, I actually don't think the vast majority of people involved with it are prone to doing any kind of "domestic terrorism." Their whole mantra is "trust the plan" — meaning that anything that happens, even if it seems really bad for them, is all part of Donald Trump's master plan. All they are supposed to do, they believe, is assist him with "research" and then sit back and "enjoy the show" when martial law is enacted and the mass arrests of everyone they've ever disliked begin. I would actually argue that the people who are most dangerous here are the ones who "lose their faith" in the face of Q's predictions not coming true and who then attempt to take things into their own hands.

For instance, while you might think that they would see the FBI's memo and wonder, if "Q" were truly in cahoots with Donald Trump and if the Q people were "helping" Trump with their "research," why he would allow the FBI to call the QAnon conspiracy shit a domestic terror threat. But they have multiple explanations!

One, currently being promoted on Gateway Pundit by Stupidest Man on the Internet Jim Hoft, is that the designation doesn't count somehow because the document cites Snopes and Wikipedia as sources.

Another is that Yahoo actually fabricated the document, in cahoots with Jill McCabe, wife of former Deputy Director of the FBI Andrew McCabe:

There is indeed a Jill McCabe who works in the Phoenix field office, but Andrew McCabe's wife, Jill, is an emergency room pediatrician. We think they might be different people. Or lizard people. Maybe that too.

Then there is the theory that this was done on purpose in order to "force the question."

What they mean by this is that the Q people have long been hoping for a reporter to ask Trump about Q, at which point they expect that he will say that "Q" is real and is acting at his behest or whatever.

One particular sentence in the FBI memo that acknowledges the fact that the existence of actual, proven conspiracies and cover-ups makes people more likely to believe in stupid, unproven conspiracies is being taken by the "anons" as "proof" that the reason the FBI considers them a threat is because what they are uncovering is real.

Another factor driving the intensity of conspiracy theorizing in the United States, and the subsequent threat from conspiracy-minded extremists, is the uncovering of real conspiracies or cover-ups involving illegal, harmful, or unconstitutional activities by government officials or leading political figures.

Reading comprehension is not their strong point!

I do believe that having a greater understanding of these conspiracy theories can help law enforcement when they are in the middle of a situation in which a perpetrator believes in one of them, but the publication of this particular memo may cause more harm than good.


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Josh Hawley's SMART Act Is So Goddamn Dumb

Hot new Missouri senator wants to break Facebook and Twitter for all the wrong reasons.

Missouri's new Republican Senator Josh Hawley is the dashing, baby-faced freshman who thinks he's got big tech all figured out. He keeps introducing bills aimed at slapping tech companies who've become too big for their bits. The only problem -- and really, it's so minor! -- is that Hawley is a fucking idiot who doesn't have a clue what he's talking about.

As the rest of Congress is getting ready to bugger off for a month, Hawley quietly dropped a bill that would turn Uncle Sam into a social media nanny. Called the Social Media Addiction Reduction Technology Act (SMART), Hawley's bill would force social media platforms to limit the amount of time people spend dicking around on their platforms each day. Hawley's bill would also force social media companies to kill off trademark features like autoplay and infinite scrolling, and similarly ban systems that reward users for their engagement, like Snapchat streak trophies.

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2020 Congressional Elections

Can Ilhan Omar's GOP Challenger Steal Her Seat Like She (ALLEGEDLY) Stole 279 Items From Target?

We don't think Omar has much to worry about here.

Republicans consider Rep. Ilhan Omar the greatest threat to democracy since fair elections. They've accused the Minnesota congresswoman of hating Jews, America, and Irving Berlin songs about America. We expect that they'll do everything in their power to unseat Omar in 2020. They're bringing out the serious, heavy artillery. Meet Omar's Republican challenger, Danielle Stella.


So, obviously, something's a little off about Stella and not just in the "I believe in trickle-down economics" sense. We're not going to drag her too mercilessly. She's not some common Megs McCabe. Stella is a special education teacher (that's nice!) whose policy positions include loving on Donald Trump, defending the rights of conservatives to say whatever bigoted crap they want online without consequence, and Second Amendment fetishism. Predictably, she opposes abortion rights and believes "choice starts in the bedroom." She doesn't specify where in your home choice ends. We'd guess the laundry room. There's only so much you can do there.

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White Nonsense

Chris Wallace Sh*ts All Over Stephen Miller, So That's 'Sad'

It's the Sunday Show Rundown!

El Presidente Trumpito's syphilis-addled brain tweets from last week, when he told four congresswomen of color ("The Squad," Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Ilhan Omar, Rashida Tlaib, and Ayanna Pressley) to "go back where you came from," sent Republicans on a weeklong Circe De SuRacists acrobatics to excuse it.

We went from Kellyanne Conway's impromptu with journalists to racists at a Trump rally chanting "Send Her Back" which Trump basked in before trying to gaslight people into believing he opposed to it only to later follow it with "sorry not sorry" while doubling down. Normally, any sane person would let this die down so the media/news cycle could move on. But norms don't exist, President Fucksquib is not a sane person, and time is a flat circle we are doomed to repeat.

Living these 2 1/2 years really ages you...


So early Sunday morning, while probably fast food constipated, Donnie decided to tweet:

So who better to speak about racism than Trump's own Wormtongue, Stephen Miller, on "Fox News Sunday" with Chris Wallace.

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