Rightwing Loons Dana Loesch And Jim Hoft All Out Of Love After Lewandowski Arrest
Kids can be so cruel. Wingnut thought leaders, too.
Elections can be so stressful on friendships. One friend supports Candidate A, while the other supports Candidate Shithead, and before you know it, they start letting their political disagreements come between them. It's very sad, and if you think the acrimony between supporters of Bernie and Hillary in the Wonkette comments (which are not allowed) gets ugly sometimes, you should see how rightwingers get in a primary campaign spat. Take, for instance, the spat between Good Christians and congenital rightwing liars Dana Loesch and Jim Hoft, whose friendship very publicly asploded all over Twitter Tuesday as the two argued over the arrest of Donald Trump's campaign manager and chief lickspittle Corey Lewandowski, for simple battery of former Breitbart Girl Reporter Michelle Fields. Gun-toting rage-harpy Loesch supports Ted Cruz, you see, and thinks security video released by police Tuesday shows Lewandowski grabbing Fields by the arm. Stupidest Man on the Internet Jim Hoft is in the tank for Trump, and knows for an absolute fact that at most the video shows Lewandowski barely "brushed up" against Fields, who is a lying liar bent on destroying Donald Trump. Or as Hoft put it:
To our untrained eye, it sure looks like the video shows Lewandowski reaching out, grabbing Fields by the arm, and pulling her backwards:
Obviously, since it doesn't show Lewandowski flinging Fields around like a pro wrestler, a careful Zaprudering of the video proves there was absolutely no battery at all. We would note that a low-framerate overhead camera isn't especially good at measuring how much force Lewandowski grabbed Fields with, but like the Jupiter, Florida, Police Department, we are part of the "liberal anti-Trump media."
Hoft took to the Twitterverse to demand Loesch and fellow rightwing numpty Katie Pavlich recant their VILE SLANDERS against America's last hope, Donald Trump, and his chief lackey:
Ah, but then he went a step too far, and accused anyone dumb enough to think they saw any kind of assault of being just as bad as liberals! This was the last straw for Loesch, who reminded Hoft that she had prayed for him and helped him when he was seriously ill in 2013 (and we are very glad he recovered, even if he is a lying hack):
It's really sad to see friends fight. Even if they're not your friends, and you think they're both lying gasbags. Come on, guys, can't you hug and make up, or whatever it is wingnuts do to make peace? Remember all the good times you had hating Michelle Obama for hating America?
You know, one of these days this election will be over, and you'll regret this. Maybe your shared hatred of President Sanders or President Clinton will bring you back together. This is the ugliest friendship freezeout since Daria and Jane Lane fell out over that guy Tom, and we feel so sad now.
Please don't let things end this way, you two. Or at least fight some more. We'll get popcorn.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.