Rob Ford, Who Did Not Have Culinary Relations With That Lady's Va-Jay-Jay, Gets TV Show Of Course
What do you do when you're a crack-smoking, vodka-guzzling, minority-bashing, homicide-threatening, self-admitted "sick motherfucker," soon-to-be-former mayor of Toronto, who has been politely asked to consider taking a leave of absence to go sit in the corner wearing a dunce cap and writing "I WILL NOT SMOKE CRACK" 100 times? If you're Rob Ford, America's favorite Canadian mayor, you go the way of all disgraced semi-megastars:
But in a new twist, Canada's Sun News Network announced that Ford and his brother Doug will begin hosting their own TV show on Monday. The show, "Ford Nation," picks up where the two brothers left off on a talk radio show that ended its run last week, the network said on its website.
A headline on that site posed the question, "Canada's Ultimate Reality Show?" And it quoted Doug Ford saying, "Rob is like Howard Stern or Rush Limbaugh" and "You just never know what he is going to say."
"Mayor Ford seems to be in a no-holds-barred mode," the network said. "There is no filter. There is no careful treading."
Who wouldn't want to watch a show about Canada's answer to Rush Limbaugh, except all unfiltered and drunk and high and -- oh, wait, exactly like Rush Limbaugh actually. Yes, this should definitely make for egggggcellent teevee. Even better than The Real Housewives of Anywhere. Just watch the Kardashians try to keep up with him. Also, he's got a jerk brother, "Doug," who is a City Councillor and crazy person his own self! FAMILY MATTERS!
Honestly, we cannot wait to see Rob, unfiltered before a live studio audience, unshackled by the not-even-pretending to uphold the dignity of his office. Right after we finish weeping for humanity.