Robert Mueller Showing Russian Hookers Pics Of Trump, Asking 'Have You Peed On This Man?'

Mama said knock you out

HAHA OUR HEADLINE IS A JOKE. We do not think that Robert Mueller is literally doing that! But Reuters reports that Mueller's investigation is now specifically using the Steele Dossier, which has not been discredited, despite what Rep. Devin Nunes and other Republicans would like you to believe:

The special counsel investigating whether Russia tried to sway the 2016 U.S. election has taken over FBI inquiries into a former British spy’s dossier of allegations of Russian financial and personal links to President Donald Trump’s campaign and associates, sources familiar with the inquiry told Reuters. [...]

Three sources with knowledge of Mueller’s probe said his investigators have assumed control of multiple inquiries into allegations by U.S. intelligence agencies that Russia interfered in the election to benefit Trump ...

It makes sense that Mueller would be working to verify/debunk the dossier, which was compiled by former British MI6 spy Christopher Steele. Now we have confirmation! While certain idiot Republicans like Senator Chuck Grassley are trying to act like the dossier itself was bought and paid for by the Russians in order to rig the election for Hillary Clinton somehow, and while the aforementioned Nunes is sending his troll baby staffers to Steele's lawyer's office to try to "unmask" Steele's true identity (Hillary Clinton), the special counsel apparently views the document with enough interest that he's using it as a road map.

On Wednesday, the leaders of the Senate Intelligence Committee gave a "progress report" on their Russia investigation. The chairman, GOP Senator Richard Burr, noted that his committee had "hit a wall" in verifying the dossier, because Steele won't talk to them. Wonder if he's talking to Mueller, HMMMMMMMM! (UPDATE: CALLED IT.) But Burr said another interesting thing about the dossier:

“Though we have been incredibly enlightened at our ability to rebuild backwards the Steele Dossier up to a certain date, getting past that point has been somewhat impossible.”

Wait ... was Burr, the Republican senator from North Carolina, saying that, much to Chuck Grassley's chagrin, his committee has confirmed parts of the dossier? It sure seemed like it, and that's the way a lot of the media reported it. And now we can tell you that NBC's Ken Dilanian has confirmed that yes, Burr was very much saying they had been able to work backwards and corroborate parts of the dossier, all the way back to a certain date, at which point they "hit a wall":

WHOA IF TRUE! Did they hit the wall before they found the pee tape? Sadly, yes! Burr said they made it back to June 2016 or so, and Wee-Wee-Palooza (ALLEGEDLY) happened in 2013. But you guys? A LOT OF THE DOSSIER covers events between June and November of 2016. Go back and read it if you haven't in a while, you'll see what we mean!

For instance, here's a thing:

Here's another thing:

When Burr says they've reverse cowgirl-ed the dossier back to that point, is he saying they've confirmed those things?

Time will tell, but we sure hope so, and we hope Mueller is also using his superpowers to confirm the fuck out of the rest of the dossier, all the way back to Pee Pee O'Clock, because we don't know how much more of President Dipshit we can take.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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