A Poor Showing For The Protests

Dana Milbank catalogs the ways that people killed time during the Roberts hearings: Counting the number of times Chuck Schumer refers to himself (Democrat staffers), doing crosswords (Sen. Coburn), protesting (not quite two dozen people). . . Sen. Arlen Specter asserted that the confirmation is "perhaps the biggest challenge of the decade." We think getting people to pay attention is. And it is a challenge we are prepared to meet:

Wonkette's Tips to Make John Roberts's Confirmation More Interesting

Figure out which senators aren't wearing make-up.

Go through box of crayons trying to approximate the exact shade of Roberts' dreamy blue eyes.

Turn off sound, do voice over giving senators funny voices or accents.

Turn off sound, start "Dark Side of the Moon." Freaky, huh?


Put ten glasses of water on your coffee table, one containing poison: close your eyes and re-arrange them. Every time Specter says, "let him finish," drink one.

Translate the hearings for your cat ("And then the senator asked 'meow meow meeeow meow meoooow.'").

Count your yawns per hour; now, can you double that the next hour?

Assfuck -- while you still can.

Prank call the committee members' offices, asking "Is your democracy running?"

Watch them with a gerbil in your trousers.

A Day of Firsts, Overshadowed [WP]

Roberts: Oh, Man [The Buzz]


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