Secretly Gay Evangelical Leader: "Who Is Mike Jones?"
Harper's called his megachurch the "most powerful" in the nation, he's in charge of one of the biggest evangelical lobbying organizations, and he has been called, by author Robert Lanham, the "Duke of Colorado Springs." Yes, Ted Haggard is a Big Deal. And he's also, like every other conservative in the country, secretly a Big Gay.
Male prostitute Mike Jones claims he's been providing his no doubt expensive services to Ted for three years. Jones also claims that the Pastor's really into meth. Which seems a little low-rent for a zillionaire preacher, but hey, if it's good enough for Fergie...
"People may look at me and think what I've done is immoral, but I think I had to do the moral thing in my mind and that is expose someone who is preaching one thing and doing the opposite behind everybody's back," said Jones.
Ted, naturally, denies everything. But he's a Republican and we're dangerously close to the midterm elections, so he's obviously having gay sex with polar bears or something.