You are not supposed to involve nonconsenting people in your kinks.
This past summer, Jerry Falwell Jr. followed in the footsteps of so, so many other prominent evangelists before him — Ted Haggard, Jimmy Swaggart, Bill Gothard, Josh Duggar, Jim Bakker, Tony Alamo, Bill Hybels, just to name a few — by becoming embroiled in a sex scandal. To his credit, unlike some of the others, his scandal was at least consensual, but like all the others he was expected to go away for a little while. But rather than go in the direction of Jimmy "I Have Sinned Against You" Swaggart the first time he got caught buying sex ...
he's decided to emulate Jimmy Swaggart the second time he got caught buying sex. The time when he decided that God actually said it's none of anyone's business if he wants to do that. Falwell Jr. is fighting back.
These are the burning questions of our time.
Have you been following the twisting tale of Rudy Giuliani going back to his hotel room with the lady he thought was a young pretty reporter who wanted to see his Little Rudy, but just as it appeared things were about to go down, Borat ran into the room like "PUT DOWN YOUR CHRAM" and shouted that she was 15 and therefore too old for him?
HERE COME THE EXCUSES.
(1) The Borat video is a complete fabrication. I was tucking in my shirt after taking off the recording equipment.… https://t.co/F6blogHGQf— Rudy W. Giuliani (@Rudy W. Giuliani)1603316544.0
HE WAS JUST TUCKING IN HIS SHIRT, YOU GUYS.
Trigger warning for Rudy Giuliani's 'trigger.'
Rudy Giuliani: How many successes can one man have in a week?
Rudy has been caught on tape, not with a Russian spy (this time), but with Borat's "daughter" Tutar, and ... well, thank goodness he didn't masturbate on Zoom or anything, but ...
OK, so in the new movie Borat: Subsequent Moviefilm, which comes out Friday on Amazon Prime, the character who plays "Tutar" is pretending to be a conservative journalist, and she gets Rudy to do an interview with her. The Daily Beast's description is very colorful, so we will use it:
It's not profound or eloquent. It's just true.
Frontline workers have been risking their lives for eight solid months now. Two hundred twenty thousand Americans are dead, while millions more are facing longterm heart and lung damage as they recover. Hundreds of thousands of businesses have closed, millions of people are out of work, and whole sectors of our economy may never come back. Kids have been stuck in the house for months on end, trying to cobble together some semblance of a normal adolescence. And the numbers are moving in the wrong direction across this country, even as we see Republicans getting ready to rip the social safety net out from under Americans on January 20.
Add in four years of Trump-branded chaos and a long overdue racial reckoning, and it's no wonder Americans are stressed out.
The very luckiest people — and I count myself among them — are working from home, spending all day in Slack and on Zoom calls. If you continue to have a paycheck and job security while the world is falling apart around you, and you don't have to risk your health and safety for it, then you won. Particularly if you don't have young children at home sucking up every waking moment of your time.
Which is a long way of saying, GET THE FUCK OUT, JEFFREY TOOBIN.