- President Obama went after the budget with his promised "scalpel" and excised $17 billion worth of fatty tissue, which experts agree is really not very impressive at all. [UPI]
- GM lost (only???) $6 billion in the first quarter of this year. [Washington Post]
- Harry Reid is going to kidnap Arlen Specter and send him to a re-education camp, where he will be drilled on important Norm Coleman-related questions until he "breaks." [New York Times]
- The citizens of Jackson, Mississippi, killed their mayor by not re-electing him. [AP]
- The WHO has to call the swine flu a "pandemic" if it starts spreading freely outside the US, but the flu has proven far less lethal than your run-of-the-mill pandemic. Will it sow seeds of needless alarm if the "p" flag is raised? (Answer: yes.) [Reuters]
- A Catholic priest in South Florida finds himself enmeshed in scandal after he was photographed on a beach doing romantical things with an adult woman. [Miami Herald]
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