You may recall the wee bit of outrage this spring when anchors at local TV affiliates owned by Sinclair Broadcasting were forced to read the very same editorial script as if it were the anchors' own opinions. Even Donald Trump made fun of the fake news, at least until he learned the Sinclair stations were also running pre-taped pro-Trump messages. Many of them even featured shitcanned former Trump White House staffer Boris Epshteyn, aka "Oh yeah, he's a different shitcanned Trump staffer than Seb Gorka." This week, Sinclair was at it again, mandating that its more than 100 stations run an Epshteyn segment praising Dear Leader for tear-gassing women and children at the border, because after all, the few dozen migrants (out of several thousand asylum seekers) who were arrested breaking through border fences Sunday was an "invasion," just like D-Day, and you wouldn't expect the USA to let an invading foreign army wade ashore without shooting back, would you?

Here's the must-run "Bottom Line With Boris" segment explaining why we must use as much force as physically possible to address a border "crisis," because fewer than 100 people barging through fences (and not one actually making it into the USA) is exactly like when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor.

Epshteyn intones,

The migrant crisis on our southern border has greatly escalated [...]

Dozens of migrants attacked US border enforcement by throwing rocks and bottles. Ultimately, American authorities had to use tear gas to stop the attacks.

They had no choice! Epshteyn claimed, echoing Trump, "The fact of the matter is that this is an attempted invasion of our country, period."

Nope. An invasion looks like this, and it generally involves an actual army:

Call what happened at the border this weekend a "riot" if you have to, but that's still not an "invasion." And we'll save for another time the point that Donald Trump's own policies restricting access to asylum are what have "escalated" tensions at the border -- the USA has routinely handled far larger numbers of border crossers in the past.

Epshteyn's little rant about saving America from the hordes of a few dozen scary Latinos provoked outrage on social media, and the National Association of Hispanic Journalists suggested it might bar Sinclair and its affiliates from events and partnerships over what it called "propaganda."

Fortunately, Sinclair made everything better Wednesday with an important announcement: Turns out you shouldn't assume Sinclair Broadcasting actually believes the things it tells its stations they must run!

See, the stations are contractually obliged to run the Epshteyn commentaries, but they're clearly labeled as Boris Epshteyn's thoughts, so don't you go saying Sinclair Broadcasting is justifying horrible opinions! Sinclair is simply requiring its stations to air the views of this one guy, who definitely does not speak for Sinclair, which is proud of its fair, unbiased journamalism!

The Washington Post notes Sinclair tweeted the disclaimer after a second "Bottoming With Boris" segment in which Epshteyn defended the honor of conspiracy doofus Laura Loomer. Loomer was banned from Twitter after another of her anti-Muslim rants; this time she accused congresswoman-elect Ilhan Omar of being an anti-Semitic monster who hates all Jews, because after all, Omar is Muslim and she once criticized Israel. Ergo, Loomer is not a bigot, but an American Patriot being censored for saying Omar is "pro Sharia" and "anti Jewish," which of course Epshteyn defended as simply factual statements.

It's not entirely clear which particular segment Sinclair is distancing itself from with its tweets -- maybe both? -- but the main thing to remember is that the corporation definitely does not endorse any of the views it requires its stations to run. Epshteyn's just this guy, you know? Not that anyone really believe's Sinclair's ass-covering:

Matthew Gertz, a fellow at Media Matters for America, said he found Sinclair's defense of Epshteyn to be disingenuous.

"He is one of a handful of right-wingers whose commentary Sinclair forces stations to run," Gertz wrote. "He has no natural audience; his YouTube views are minuscule."

We're looking forward to Sinclair clarifying it didn't really intend anyone to think these are its official views, either:

But we guess things have changed since that hilarious montage was put together back in March. At the time, Sinclair's chairman, David D. Smith, scoffed at criticism of the mandatory editorial, explaining in an email to the New York Times,

"You cant be serious!" he wrote. "Do you understand that as a practical matter every word that comes out of the mouths of network news people is scripted and approved by someone?"

Everything, that is, except Boris Epshteyn's independent thoughts which are his and not actually the opinion of anyone.

We hope you will enjoy our next feature, an essay on the absolute necessity of abstinence-only sex ed, which Yr Editrix will later say didn't reflect her views when she made us write it.

[Daily Beast / Vox / Mediaite / WaPo / NYT]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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'Baby Geniuses' star Jon Voight took to Twitter early this morning to proclaim his undying love for Donald Trump, probably because there is no one left in his life who will listen to him talk about this, or anything else, in person. In this video rant, Voight encouraged members of the Republican Party, whom he apparently thinks are the only real citizens of the United States, to stand by Donald Trump and "acknowledge the truth" that he is the best President since Abraham Lincoln.

Part ONE:

People of the Republican Party, I know you will agree with me when I say our president has our utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he's battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I've said this once and I'll say this again. That our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I'm here today to acknowledge the truth, and I'm here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country…

Oh no, not our absurd words of destruction!

Part DEUX:

is stronger, safer, and with more jobs because our President has made his every move correct. Don't be fooled by the political left, because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth, that President Trump is the greatest president since President Lincoln.

Does Jon Voight not know there have been... other presidents? Can he name them? Because really, it does not sound like it. Does he also not know that a very big chunk of the Republican Party actually does not care very much for Abraham Lincoln? Namely those defenders of Confederate statues that Trump called "very fine people?" Also, did he intentionally diss their beloved Ronald Reagan?

Who can know? Who can even tell what he is trying to say or why he is trying to say it. He doesn't appear to have tweeted much since 2016, so I'm guessing whoever's job it was to keep him from tanking his career quit. Either that... or after filming the seventh season of Ray Donovan, he found out it's going to be canceled or his character is getting killed off or something and he is now free to be a jackass? I don't know, I haven't watched the show, although my parents are very into it and mad that I haven't watched it. Literally all I know about it is that it has something to do with Boston, because they keep mentioning that to me like it's a selling point.

It seems useless at this point to note that the people who scream their faces off about how bad it is for Hollywood celebs to support liberal causes, and how they should keep their politics to themselves, etc. etc. make a way bigger deal than normal people do whenever a Big Time Hollywood Celebrity like Jon Voight or, uh, Scott Baio, supports their cause. Mostly because they're the only ones who have elected a reality TV star and the star of Bedtime for Bonzo (who by the way, also once practically ruined a perfectly good Bette Davis movie with his bad acting. Which is not to say that Dark Victory is not fantastic and probably the best thing to watch if you want to sob your face off, but he was very bad in it.) to run the country.

But we might as well do that anyway, because it actually never stops being funny.

[Jon Voight Twitter]

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