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Silence, peons! A Job Creator is Speaking! This particular Employer is Tom Stemberg (just


"Boss" to you) and he is alleged to have Created Jobs as a co-founder of Staples, a successful dispensary for overpriced printer ink. Stemberg, a Titan of Industry, is out and about, and raising some very interesting questions. (Let's just get the question that immediately comes to mind out of the way: OOOH, DO YOU THINK HE KNEW MITT AT STAPLES?!) Now: will Obamacare, as Stemberg asserts, allow ladies/wet nurses in Private Employ to breastfeed in peace, and thereby permanently cripple job creation across America, forever?

Stemberg offers his careful interpretation of Obamacare to wingnut digital pamphlet CNS News:

“Do you want [farming retailer] Tractor Supply to open stores or would you rather they take their capital and do what Obamacare and its 2,700 pages dictates – which is to open a lactation chamber at every single store that they have?” he asked.

First, thank you, sir, for citing the number of pages because the size of the bill is so rarely mentioned, though it is fairly DAMNING EVIDENCE PER SE. Second, whoawhoawhoa! Can you make this stuff up?

“You can’t make this stuff up.”

Cool, just wanted to double-check.

Now, don't get him wrong, guys. He's "big on breastfeeding." His wife did it. In fact, Stembergs have been breastfeeding since time immemorial. This Stemberg is just not really into investing Capital into the milk needs of the lower orders' spawn, that's all, so just go ahead and repeal Obamacare, or the economy gets it, thanks! [CNS News]

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