Trump

Is Manhattan DA Cyrus Vance Coming For ALL Trump's Naughty Fraudy Sh*t? Maybe!

Trump's post-presidency might be fun! (For Cyrus Vance, and for America.)

Something might be happening that is VERY STINKY for Donald Trump and his biological family and his extended crime family. (There is some overlap there, obviously.)

When the Supreme Court ruled a few weeks back in Trump v. Vance, it said without a shadow of a doubt that YES, the president can be investigated and subpoenaed by a state-level prosecutor. But that was the narrow question at hand. It didn't mean Trump's dumbass lawyers couldn't go back to court and argue that Manhattan DA Cyrus Vance's subpoenas weren't wrongbad for a different reason they pulled out of their ass. Everybody expected them to do so, and that's just what they did.

What was important about that Supreme Court ruling is that it established that for these purposes, the president is exactly like the rest of us, and has to argue the exact same things the rest of us plebeians have at our disposal. "Waaaaaah, this subpoena is too broad, it is too burdensome, I have a tee-off after lunch, too busy, WAAAAAAAH" is a thing they could say, for instance. He doesn't get to whine that he is president, therefore you cannot touch him.

The Manhattan DA's investigation, if you'll remember, was (as far as we know) into Trump's original PPP, which did not stand for "Paycheck Protection Program," but rather "Porn Peener Payments," and that's why Vance wants Trump's taxes and financials from his accounting firm, Mazars USA. But somethin' INNARESTIN' happened in court yesterday, after Trump's lawyers tried to say, "Waaaaah, this subpoena is too broad, it is too burdensome, I got tee-time, too busy, WAAAAAAAH."

Vance came back with a filing that said actually, our investigation might be much more broad than you think, we are just saying, so perhaps you should cough it the fuck up. The filing mentions "alleged insurance and bank fraud by the Trump Organization and its officers" — IT IS JUST SAYING — and then continues:

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coronavirus

Stop Trying To Make Schools Happen

They're not going to happen.

Time for all the kids to get ready for school, and this year, in addition to the usual back-to-school preparations, families are wondering what kind of school the kids will be getting back to (online, in-person, or "hybrid"). Kids are looking forward to seeing their friends again, at least when they're not having anxiety attacks about the coronavirus. And teachers are updating their lesson plans, and in many places, their wills.

In Yr Dok Zoom's hometown of Boise, Idaho, the school district was supposed to hold a meeting Monday night to decide whether to open for in-person classes on August 17 as originally planned, or whether to shift some or all instruction online at first. Unfortunately, the board's streaming software kept crashing and locking out board members and the public, so after a while they gave up and rescheduled the meeting for tonight. We bet Boise won't be the only school system that has to try turning the school year off and on again this year. Let's take a look at some of the big school-reopening stories around the USA!

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2020 presidential election

James O'Keefe Trying To ​Entice Voting Rights Onto His Dildo Lube Boat

Boy Idiot keeps failing upward.

James O'Keefe, the undercover "journalist" who keeps running absolute garbage hidden-camera "sting operations," is working on a great big project to help Donald Trump win reelection this year by delegitimizing absentee voting, The New Republic reports. His "Project Veritas" (Latin for I Project Venereally) is running operations in several states this year aimed at supporting Donald Trump's bullshit contention that mail-in voting is unspeakably fraudulent. That way, if Trump somehow loses this election in which he is overwhelmingly popular and everyone loves him, there'll be an explanation, not to mention fuel for years of additional fundraising by the loony Right.

Based on a trove of internal Project Vanitas documents and chats with several past and present insiders at O'Keefe's little ratfucking mill, the article, by Wonkette alumnus Matthew Phelan and Wonkette not-alumnus Jesse Hicks, gets the obvious out of the way: James O'Keefe has no fucking credibility and Project Verminshit seldom turns up anything more incriminating than liberals saying liberal opinions out loud. (See?! BIAS!) Nonetheless, the dipshit and his crew of fellow dipshits keep attracting big donations from big GOP donors, and that puts O'Keefe

at the vanguard of a larger underhanded approach that Republicans, starting at the very top, are taking to the 2020 cycle. If they want to win, they really have no other choice but to undermine the vote: Trump's poll numbers are in the basement, and he appears constitutionally incapable of making appeals beyond his hardcore supporters on the right.

Project Vomitus may be inept peddlers of dishonest bullshit, but it sure makes lots of noise. And in that, it's no different from what has become the GOP mainstream and the US government.

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Elections

Nevada Legalizes Safe Voting, So Trump Ragetweets GOP Into Another Pointless Lawsuit

It's a bold strategy, Cotton!

He's saying the quiet part out loud again.

President Donald Trump has once again taken to Twitter to admit that his entire reelection strategy rests on making sure Americans can't vote.

And by "in force," the RNC Chair means a whole 19 people showed up to protest when the legislature met to pass a law making it safe to vote during a pandemic. And while we're on the subject, WTF is a "clubhouse governor?"

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