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Hello Wonks! It was Sunday and, even though it was a day to celebrate mothers, I had the wonderful task of finding the dumbest motherfucking things said on the political shows. So, without further ado, let’s jump right in.


First, we have new Secretary of State Mike Pompeo on Fox News Sunday. While speaking of the upcoming North Korea meeting with Trump, he mentioned how the U.S. would help North Korea:

CHRIS WALLACE: I want to go back to the comment and Kevin just played it. Your comment on Friday that if Kim chooses the, quote, right path, the US is prepared to work with North Korea to, quote, achieve prosperity.

What does that mean as far as direct US investment in North Korea and are we as part of this willing in effect to guarantee Kim's security? That regime change will be off the table?

POMPEO: Chris, here's what this will look like. This will be Americans coming in -- private-sector Americans, not the US taxpayer, private-sector Americans helping build the energy grid. They need enormous amounts of electricity in North Korea, to work with them to develop infrastructure. All the things that the North Korean people need, the capacity for American agriculture to support North Korea so they can eat meat and have healthy lives.

Those are the kinds of things that if we get what it is the president has demanded, the complete, verifiable, irreversible denuclearization of North Korea, that the American people will offer in spades.

Wow! That sounds amazing for North Korea, but I’m pretty sure we have 3 million Americans without a working power grid RIGHT NOW! I mean, what have Puerto Ricans ever done for the US besides enrich the culture and provide singers, actors, Hall of Fame baseball players and a Supreme Court justice? And also, a little thing called "be citizens of it"?

It’s not like they are without power or water from last hurricane season and about to face the new one two weeks from now. Maybe instead of becoming sexy and amazing, Puerto Rico should have started a Nuclear Weapons program. Because apparently that is sharing the values and objectives of the American people:

POMPEO: When I said earlier this week that I think Chairman Kim shares the objectives with the American people, I'm convinced of that.

I’m so glad YOU’RE convinced. Your reasoning for being convinced, though, gave me some déjà vu:

POMPEO: He knows -- he knows his brief, he knows what he is trying to achieve for the North Korean people. He is able to deal with complexity when the conversation requires it.

He does follow the Western press. He will probably watch the show at some point. He's paying attention to things the world is saying.

Now we turn to National Security “Advisor” John Bolton on CNN's State of the Union. While Pompeo is dealing with trying to get a denuclearization deal with North Korea, Bolton is enjoying his first loin movement in over a decade thanks to the shredding of Iran's denuclearization deal and -- his favorite -- possible war! Jake Tapper, however, had to spoil all the fun by pointing out WE are the ONLY country leaving the Iran Nuclear Deal, which puts us on a lonely and isolating path when it comes to the sanctions. But Bolton brought that patented charm he built as U.N. Ambassador to smooth things over:

BOLTON: I think the issue here is what the Europeans are going to do. If they're going to see that it's not in their interest to stay in the deal -- we're going to have to watch what the Iranians do. They'd love to stay in the deal. Why shouldn't they? They got everything they wanted from the Obama administration.

But I think the Europeans will see that it's in their interest, ultimately, to come along with us.

TAPPER: With all due respect, I've been speaking to European diplomats. And that's not the impression I get. They -- they...

BOLTON: Well, that's not the -- that's not the impression now, because...

TAPPER: They say they're going to stay in the deal.

BOLTON: And -- and they may try to do so, in -- in part because, I think, despite the complete consistency of President Trump in his opposition to the deal, opposed to it as candidate Trump, opposed to it as president-elect Trump, opposed to it as President Trump, many people, including apparently former Secretary of State John Kerry, thought that we never would get out of it.

Now, I don't know how to explain why people could miss what the president was saying. So, I think, at the moment, there's some feeling in Europe that they're really surprised we got out of it, really surprised at the imposition of strict sanctions.

I think that will sink in. And we'll see what happens then. The president's very clear he wants to discuss the larger threat posed by Iran around the region. And this is what he discussed with President Macron. He's talked about it with Chancellor Merkel. He's talked about it with Prime Minister May, not just Iran's nuclear threat now, the threat in the future, the ballistic missile programs, and the instability that Iran is causing around the region.

TAPPER: Right…. But, with all due respect, I didn't get an answer to the question. Is the U.S. going to impose sanctions on European companies that continue to do business with Iran?

BOLTON: I -- I think I did give the answer, and the answer...

TAPPER: But you said, we'll see.

BOLTON: The answer is, it's possible.

TAPPER: It's possible.

BOLTON: It depends on the conduct of other governments.

So, while we are discussing a nuclear deal with North Korea IF they promise to dismantle their nuclear program, we are re-imposing sanctions on Iran who already did enter a nuclear deal and have complied with disarmament of their nuclear program while at the same time threatening our own allies with possible sanctions if they don’t follow us down Trump’s path of idiocy? Neat.

Let’s end on former senior adviser for Trump Michael Caputo. He was on the CNN State of the Union panel as the lonely voice defending the heinous comment made by White House staffer Kelly Sadler about Arizona Senator John McCain. Sadler, in a White House communications meeting, “joked” about McCain’s objection to known torturer Gina Haspel for CIA Director, “Who cares? He’s dying anyways.”

While we may disagree with the political views of Senator John McCain, most decent human beings do not wish death by cancer on people. But since that was indefensible, Michael Caputo (and the White House) have decided the REAL problem about this is the fact it leaked!

Caputo: I think that the White House is looking at the leak because, you know, there are so many leaks out of the White House. I understand that Kelly called Meghan McCain and apologized to her. I think she handled it well by doing that. I think if this was a comment said on the record by the White House, they would absolutely have to apologize. This is a leak by some people who are working hard to undermine this president. I don't think it is White House's responsibility to apologize for it. It's already been apologized for. I think we need to move on and stop wringing our hands about it.

Please go on, Mr. Caputo:

CAPUTO: Listen, McCain has for the longest time been a combative senator. He has worked very hard against this president. He has done things to undermine this president. You have to understand that not everybody on this planet loves John McCain. But at this point in time we all need to step back and let his family and the senator live in peace.

When that line of logic fails, Caputo goes for one more:

CAPUTO: And John McCain has been out there punching with the best of them. But this is -- with cancer. Of course, you don't. I think it was a joke made in bad taste. It wasn't a joke made in the public arena.

We don't know that it actually took place. It is a leak. But at this point in time the White House needs to get a handle on who is leaking out of that place because this stuff is just absolutely outrageous.

Yes, how DO we know that this took place? Other than a week of admissions, statements of private apologetic phone calls and complaints of the leaking of it without refuting the statement. OTHER THAN THAT, how do we know this, Michael Caputo?

See the whole discussion below if you so desire:

So, with that, we end this look at the Sunday shows and begin a new week full of insanity from this White House.

Until next Sunday, I’ll be figuring out if this is reality or if we are in some sick amusement park run by the Delos Corporation.

via GIPHY

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Michael Mora

Pop Culture observer & Comics fan. Amateur Movie Reviewer. Political Freelance Writer @wonkette. Marine, Husband & Dad. Opinions are mine only.

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