Did Two Syphilitic Raccoons Just F*ck Each Other To Death In The Rose Garden, Or Was That Just Trump's Brain?

'I didn't need to do this,' said the president, about the NATIONAL EMERGY he just declared.

Post-Racial America

President Good Brain Invents Fourth Of July

WHAT WILL HE COME UP WITH NEXT?

News

Trump's Latest Fox News Hire Seems ... Kinda Qualified Actually?!

We thought they had procedures in place to prevent this sort of thing.

News

Are George Papadopoulos And Sergei Millian The Two Dumbest Idiots In The Whole Trump-Russia Scandal? Sure Why Not.

Ready for a WONKETTE DICK JOKE DEEP DIVE LONG READ? Well come right here and sit a spell!

Russia

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