Texas First Responders Sue After Perfectly Harmless Chemical Not-Explosion Made Them Sick

It's probably all in their heads. And their lungs. And maybe their bloodstreams.

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FEMA To Run Out Of Money By Friday. Good Thing No Disasters Are On The Way!

Somebody really needs to explain free-market economics to these unruly hurricanes.

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Cat Check: Here Are Two Pussies Donald Trump Definitely Didn't Grab

Has Donald Trump ever had a pet? We don't think any animals would like him. It's also your OPEN THREAD.

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Chemicals At Flooded Texas Plant Definitely Didn't Explode, Sheriff Says, They Just Popped A Bit

Maybe it was an 'explosion,' but really, it was more of a vigorous 'overpressure' and 'rupture' of a container, OK?

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