Ted Cruz Apology Tour Over, Back To Being Total A-Hole

That lasted about eight minutes.

Congress

Trump Suspending Immigration Because HEY, WHERE ARE THE F*CKING TESTS?

SQUIRREL!

Trump

HUD Withholding Hurricane Aid To Puerto Rico Until It Investigates Joe Biden

Seriously. We're not even kidding.

White House

Meet Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman, The Purple Heart Who's F*cking Trump Up Today!

Also Gordon Sondland, CALL YOUR LAWYER.

Impeachment