Trump's Executive Time Golfing Ketchup Omelet National Emergency Holiday Whack-Off Weekend Was Pretty Chill

This is not what normal people do on vacation.

Trump Own Goals The Libs On Twitter. Again.

You're supposed to OWN the libs, IDIOT.

Did Two Syphilitic Raccoons Just F*ck Each Other To Death In The Rose Garden, Or Was That Just Trump's Brain?

'I didn't need to do this,' said the president, about the NATIONAL EMERGY he just declared.

Post-Racial America

President Big Mac Tanning Bed So Mad Everybody Knows He's Lazyass

Sad! Maybe he should compose a very lazy tweet about it.