Teabag Lady First Person Ever To Use 'Forced Down Our Throats' Correctly


If you follow American politics and you have a soul, one of your least favorite phrases is some variation of "forced down our throats." This is generally used to imply that some law or regulation has gone into effect as a result of an election in which the winning side received 52 to 56 percent of the vote, as typical in a democratic system (e.g., "This health care reform has been rammed down our throats"). It is occasionally hilarious when it involves gayness (e.g., "The tyrannical courts are shoving gay marriage down our throats") because it makes it clear how much the speaker thinks about hot cocks and the deep-throating thereof. But it's almost never used in a political context to describe the sorts of things that might actually enter a person's throat (i.e., food) -- until one brave teabagger candidate for the Montana legislature dared speak out against this communist "healthy eating" craze.

Kristi Allen-Gailushas is running for state office in Montana, and she's got something to say! And so she has chosen the official American soapbox: a long, rambling letter to the editor of her local free weekly newspaper, the Queen City News. In the midst of her extensive rant about the tyranny of the new proposed local school curriculum, there is this amazing paragraph:

The section about nutrition is not the responsibility of the school to teach. This is something taught in the home. The proponents like to say our schoolchildren are obese. By whose standards? Every child is different. Kids are short, tall, skinny or bigger. Who sets the standards for obesity? Whose business is it if some kids are a little overweight? They also want to teach proper portion size in a meal. Who sets those standards? This is no one’s business to teach outside of the home. I am tired of health and nutrition being forced down our throats day in and day out. If I want to take myself and my family to eat pizza four times a week and have McDonald’s the other three days of the week, that is no one’s business but my own.

Yes, Kristi, Michelle Obama would like nothing more than to come to your home, where you teach your family about how McNuggets are fucking delicious, and literally force health and nutrition down your throat, in the form of arugula and other fancy foods that aren't made entirely out of processed corn byproducts. They also set the portion size standards tyrannically, so that every American will be forced to eat meals that are no larger than a quarter, like at a comical French restaurant in a sitcom.

Anyway, Allen-Gailushas is also predictably incensed about a new sex ed curriculum (“in second grade, kids are taught not to make fun of people by calling them 'gay' or 'queer'" -- MORE PRECIOUS FREEDOMS UNDER ATTACK), so maybe she's also using "forced down our throats" in the "hot cocks" sense as well. (Except she's a lady, so that wouldn't be gay? Hmm.) [Queen City News/KXLH via Montana Cowgirl]

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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