Photo: Wikimedia Commons

Ted Nugent, a native of Michigan, took to Facebook Wednesday to express his displeasure at the Badger Chevrolet Wolverine State for electing a whole bunch of Democrats, and maybe one Democrat in particular if you know what he means and we think you do.

On the compendium of random brainsharts that serves as his Facebook page, the full-time Texas resident explained the majority of Michigan voters certainly don't speak for most Michiganders, like him, for instance.

Real God country family Michiganiacs are heartbroke that more of us want the once great state of Michigan to turn into a California shithole. Downright insane cultural suicide. Thanks for nothing assholes.

Entirely too many local and national media outlets were surprisingly unclear about what particular electoral outcomes Nugent could have had in mind. Here's the Hill missing the point:

A day after his fellow Michiganders voted to elect Democrat Gretchen Whitmer for governor and flipped two congressional seats held by Republicans to elect Democrats Elissa Slotkin and Haley Stevens, Nugent took to Facebook...

How about Detroit teevee station WXYZ?

Nugent is an outspoken Conservative and supporter of President Donald Trump. Michiganders elected Democrats Gretchen Whitmer for governor, Jocelyn Benson for secretary of state, Dana Nessel for attorney general and also flipped two Republican congressional seats to Democrats by electing Elissa Slotkin and Haley Stevens.

Michigan newspaper consortium MLive seemed not to get what Nugent was getting at either, apart from the general "Democrats = California = Shithole" formulation:

The Michigan rocker known for his extreme conservative opinions took to Facebook to voice his displeasure after voters elected a slew of Democrats to key state offices including Gov. Gretchen Whitmer, Attorney General Dana Nessel, Sen. Debbie Stabenow and Secretary of State Jocelyn Benso.

Guys! Yeah, sure, Nugent doesn't like liberals or Democrats, sure. But you're completely ignoring that line about "downright insane cultural suicide," which is taken straight from the Steve Bannon / white nationalist phrasebook. Fortunately, the Detroit Metro Times knew exactly which winning Democrat from Tuesday that was aimed at, since Nugent's Facebook followers all griped about her winning:

While some folks simply empathized with Nugent for having fallen out of love with his home state of Michigan, Nugent supporters and blatant racists dragged Michigan's Rashida Tlaib, who, as of Tuesday, became the first Muslim woman appointed to US Congress (along with Minnesota's Ilhan Omar).

Yup, that's about the shape of it. Ted Nugent isn't exactly subtle, and frankly, we're annoyed that most other outlets failed to even notice that great big white nationalist turd, which is far nastier than Nugent merely saying Michigan had too many Democrats.

No, we're really sure it's Rashida Tlaib he had in mind, not that ballot measure to put redistricting in the hands of a nonpartisan commission.

Oh, yes, and with another massacre in the news this morning, the Nugent clan also knows it can't possibly have anything to do with America's virtually unregulated ocean of guns, heck no! Ted's wife Shemane writes that since even countries that ban guns still have (very rare) shootings, we need to look elsewhere for the real causes, like maybe ... potato chips! Or not eating potatoes at all! Or eating your potatoes (or not) alone while playing video games:

In a PLOS journal study, it was determined that synthetic compounds in trans-fatty foods cause aggressive behavior, as does eliminating food groups such as carbs. Can violent video games cause a lack of sensitivity to reality? What about the growing number of children at home without supervision after school?

So please, America, let's all eliminate trans-fats, eat more carbs, be gooder parents, and bar Muslims from public office so we can all have lots and lots more guns and all get along, except for Democrats, who need to die, AMEN.

And now it is your Open Thread!

[Ted Nugent on Facebook / Detroit Metro Times]

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Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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