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Whatcha doin' down there at Mar-a-Lago, Mister Normal President Of America?

OK ... huh?


At first they -- and by "they," we mean the White House -- didn't even know what the fuck Grandpa Twitterpaws was talking about. John Roberts of Fox News reported that they thought Trump might be yapping out his A-hole about sanctions put on these two Chinese shipping companies yesterday, but still, they were ?????

First of all, Trump apparently doesn't know what day it is, because he said the sanctions in question were announced today, when in actuality they were announced yesterday.

But at last, everybody figured out what Trump's fever dream tweeting was about, with the New York Times confirming that "[o]n Thursday, the Treasury Department imposed new sanctions on two Chinese shipping companies that it says have been helping [North Korea] evade international sanctions." It was these sanctions that National Security Advisor John Bolton was really happy about yesterday (told you he wasn't the real national security advisor):

So that's awesome. Congratulations, North Korea! Congratulations, China! Congratulations, Vladimir Putin probably!

Point is, it's awesome that Trump is doing foreign policy declarations in his underwear on Twitter at Mar-a-Lago (again).

But ... he's lifting sanctions Treasury -- his own Treasury Department, led by his own hand-picked secretary, Steven Mnuchin -- imposed ... yesterday? FORWHYTHOUGH? Why is he declaring war on his own administration like this? Are his own people the Deep State now? Please advise, Sarah Huckabee Sanders!

Sarah Huckabee Sanders, the White House press secretary, said the decision was a favor to Mr. Kim.

"President Trump likes Chairman Kim, and he doesn't think these sanctions will be necessary," she said.

By God, we think Sarah Huckabee Sanders told the truth, mark it on your calendars. Trump is prematurely ejaculating love offerings upon Kim Jong Un, because AND WE QUOTE THE PRESIDENT they "fell in love," and if you can't be with the one you love, at least unsanction them, so they'll know you're thinking about them.

Do we all forget already how Trump had a YOOOGE HISTORIC SUMMIT with Kim in Vietnam, which was aborted suddenly in abject failure, probably at least in part because Trump was too preoccupied with how Michael Cohen was back there in America accusing him of crimes in front of Congress, which may have rendered him completely unable to get it up to Do Summit? Afterward, he came out and rambled at the press about how a lot of people had never heard the word "denuclearization" and then he flew home on the airplane as a bigger loser he was when he left America. Remember? Yeah, we remember.

Anyway, here's a present, Kim!

We are sure this is all very legal and very cool, and it's not at all embarrassing watching the President of the United States suck up to a dictator who can't even fly places on planes, because his country's airplane is under a tarp in the garage.

And with that, have a lovely weekend, it is your OPEN THREAD. Don't unsanction anybody Trump wouldn't unsanction. Wait, that's bad advice, forget about it.

[New York Times]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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Cripes the News has been awful lately! And so Yr Editrix suggested we find some good, positive news. Especially after we pitched writing a Wonket about this Mother Jones story on how global warming may be killing the whales, even though Donald Trump knows their prince. (Reply: "Nope. FOR SURE NOT THAT.") And so, as a reminder that a gooder world is possible and apropos of nothing at all that definitely didn't set your Editrix off on Twitter, where she has been stewing and bitching most shrillfully about the 2016 election and the 2020 election and any terrible similarities thereof and thereupon and therefore and thereto, we present a collection of videos of Elizabeth Warren yelling at big banks and calling for them to be broken up and their criminal operators to go to jail. Puppies and kittens will only get you so far, after all.

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