That Lululemon Jerk Is Still A Total Pervy Jerk

  • Remember how Chip Wilson, the founder of overpriced yoga pants store Lululemon, is a total jerk? Oh, did you forget that he's a total jerk? Here, have a reminder:

    In March 2013, Lululemon recalled 17 percent of its black yoga pants — which don’t come in a size larger than 12 — because its proprietary Luon fabric was too sheer. Some women who tried to return the pants at Lululemon stores said they were told to put them on and bend over so staff members could determine just how see-through they were. After a monthslong public-relations disaster, Wilson, who was chairman of the company, went on Bloomberg TV that November to share what he thought was a reasonable explanation. “Some women’s bodies don’t work for the pants,” he said. “It’s really about the rubbing through the thighs, how much pressure is there over a period of time.”

    Riiight. Now you remember. That guy. The one who said some women's asses are just too fat to look good in his miracle makes-your-fat-ass-look-sooooooo-good yoga pants. Anyhoo, he's not done being a jerk, and despite his obligatory "sorry if I offended you yadda yadda" PR tour in 2013, he's not really sorry for, you know, just tellin' it like it is.

    “I think that Lululemon was so successful because I was probably the only straight guy that was making women’s apparel, and I knew what a guy liked,” Wilson told me. “Girls ended up wearing it, and guys commented on it.”

    Yeah, he made those yoga pants for you, ladies, except not really. He made them so he could enjoy looking at your ass. But, like, in an inspirational way.

    Wilson used the shops and their bags as a platform for the self-help mantras he finds so inspiring, with a lowercase manifesto admonishing customers that “waiting to implement changes will leave you two steps behind. do it now, do it now, do it now!” and “have you woken up two days in a row uninspired? change your life!”

    Could he be any grosser? Yes.

    But oddly enough, though he has a kind of savant sense for what will make women buy a piece of stretch fabric at a price, Wilson maintains an almost touching belief that it was all those mantras and manifestoes that built Lululemon. He likes to quote Ayn Rand — he once put “Who was John Galt?” on a Lululemon shopping bag — and to repeat the lessons of the Landmark Forum, the controversial program of motivational seminars founded on Werner Erhard’s ’70s EST philosophy of “self-actualization.” It has been called a cult, but Wilson told me that when he first discovered Landmark, he was struck by the idea that “once I take responsibility, then I have power.” He is a strict believer, and he has used it to shape Lululemon’s corporate culture.

    He's not really involved with the company anymore; he's busy making a bazillion new dollars off his newest idea for selling overpriced exercise clothes. But that doesn't mean he has stopped thinking about how he wants to look at your ass:

    As he spoke, a shapely brunette approached from below. She passed us on the narrow trail, wearing pants with the Lululemon logo just above her tailbone. Wilson followed her backside with his eyes. He turned to me with a grin. “It’s my job,” he said. “I have to look.”

  • Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell told a "joke," you guys. Brace yourselves for the side splitting:

    The new majority leader acknowledged that he faced challenges from both the left and right in running the Senate, noting that Senator Ted Cruz of Texas had said he was willing to throw himself in front of a train to repeal the new health care law.

    “That idea has some merit to it,” Mr. McConnell cracked.

  • If you live in some part of the country that has winter -- and seriously, why would you do that when you can be wearing flip-flops in California right now? -- you're getting another six weeks of it:

    Punxsutawney Phil, the groundhog famous for his weather predictions, saw his shadow after emerging from his burrow atop Gobbler’s Knob in western Pennsylvania on Monday, forecasting six more weeks of winter.

    Yeah yeah yeah, that happens every year, but this doesn't:

    In Wisconsin, Jimmy the Groundhog bit the ear of Sun Prairie Mayor Jon Freund as the rodent whispered a prediction that, tradition has it, only the mayor can understand. Freund told the crowd Jimmy predicted spring is on the way.

    Well, except that groundhogs biting mayors apparently isn't that unusual. So this year:

    This time, a specially built rodent-sized elevator lifted the groundhog called Staten Island Chuck into what zoo officials called "an innovative Groundhog Day viewing unit": a box with clear plastic sides and fake turf.

    Enjoy your winter, rest of America that doesn't get to wear flip-flops yet.

  • Wikipedia is going to teach you how to learn some black history:

    Have you ever looked at Wikipedia and said to yourself, “something’s missing”? Now is your chance to learn how to edit Wikipedia while improving the website's entries on Black history and culture. With our Wikipedia Edit-a-thon event, you will be able to create entries like the "Harlem Book Fair" or add images of Xenobia Bailey’s beautiful crochet artwork to her page.

    It's a really cool way to solve a problem, even if it's a damned shame that it's a problem in the first place:

    Director Khalil Muhammad joined HuffPost Live on Monday to discuss The Schomberg Center's Wikipedia Edit-A-Thon, which looks to improve the narrative of black history and culture on the site. As Muhammad explained, the dearth of information about black historical figures on Wikipedia is a real issue.

    “[Wikipedia] is, for [millennials], the source of information that they go to, and therefore, if they are looking up Ida B. Wells and Ida B. Wells isn’t there, then Ida B. Wells doesn’t count," Muhammad told host Nancy Redd.

  • This family-owned hotel has been in business for 1300 years. As in, yeah, more than a thousand years. Amazing:
  • Looking for the latest bewb tube shenanigans and snarky recaps of your favorite teevee shows? Go show some love to our gone-but-not-forgotten kid sister Happy Nice Time People. And be sure to follow Happy Nice Time People on Twitter.

[Image via Lululemon Instagram]


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