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The Clinton Effect

We already knew that Bill Clinton transformed an entire generation of chastity-loving teens into crazed oral sex tramps. Now, we learn he's had a similar impact on middle-aged D.C. horndogs. Writes glamorous D.C. intern Abbie Finfrock: "Seven years on, each new crop of eager and wide-eyed interns arrives like fresh prey for the city's political predators. Far from dampening the instincts of the political classes, the Lewinsky scandal appears to have egged them on." And she's right, of course. Until the mid-1990s, middle-aged D.C. horndogs were obsessed with their work. Plop a fresh nubile 20-year-old on their desks, and they were, like, "Nope, sorry, gotta keep hashing out this farm support bill." Now, thanks to the bad example set by the former president, all they can think about is planting corn in loamy blondes. It's almost like Clinton is the King Midas of sluttiness -- everything he touches just turns sexier. What does that say about how much he touches or doesn't touch Hillary? Draw your own conclusions. But even just being in the same city where the King once worked his magic appears to be having an impact on Finfrock.


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Sex, Power, and the Monica Factor [Daily Telegraph]

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Cripes the News has been awful lately! And so Yr Editrix suggested we find some good, positive news. Especially after we pitched writing a Wonket about this Mother Jones story on how global warming may be killing the whales, even though Donald Trump knows their prince. (Reply: "Nope. FOR SURE NOT THAT.") And so, as a reminder that a gooder world is possible and apropos of nothing at all that definitely didn't set your Editrix off on Twitter, where she has been stewing and bitching most shrillfully about the 2016 election and the 2020 election and any terrible similarities thereof and thereupon and therefore and thereto, we present a collection of videos of Elizabeth Warren yelling at big banks and calling for them to be broken up and their criminal operators to go to jail. Puppies and kittens will only get you so far, after all.

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Spinal Tap - Gimme Some Money

Some dick is suing your Wonkette! If you are able, will you please send money?

1. Pick "just once" or "monthly."

2. Pick an amount, like say "all of the money."

3. Click "paypal" if you are paypal or "stripe" if you are not paypal.

4. MONEY.

5. Carry on with your day, and with new posts below!

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